by Dee Finney

These meditations were done sometimes to chakra meditation tapes, and sometimes on my own.

12-12-89 - DREAM - I didn't know if I was awake or sleep. I was doing the chakra meditations and worked on sewing up my etheric web. My astral phone rang and it was Terry R. and then T.R. called on the real phone, but the whole thing was in a dream within a dream. It freaked me out because I couldn't figure out if I was awake or sleeping. Finally, I went down the street to see a yellow house I wanted to buy and then went to my job caring a tall, thin blue book and blue and white yarn. At the job, a big mess of wood shavings was on the floor that I would have to sweep up and I came to a child that was flopped over like a Raggedy Ann doll.

She didn't have any strength in her muscles. I helped her to stand and walk and told her that she was a beautiful child.

NOTE: Personally, I have an illness called Chronic fatigue syndrome which the experts are calling Raggedy Ann Syndrome.


12-16-89 - Meditation - I was working on the 'root' chakra. I saw 3 female witches books wrapped and sealed in cellophane. Then I saw 3 male witches books open and ready for use.

I flipped into a dream state to tell T.M. what I had seen. I was on an elevator. It stopped and opened at what I thought was the first floor. I don't recall seeing anyone there. I just had this intense desire to tell T.M. what I had seen. I got back into the elevator, but th e door wouldn't close all the way. I pressed the UP button. The elevator began to go up, but it didn't stop at 2, or 3, or 4, it just continued to go up. I thought to myself, "It'll continue to go up until it hits the top, then it'll drop all the way to the bottom, but I don't care. The elevator kept right on going and I was getting ready to scream out loud.

When I opened my eyes, I still felt like I was going up.


2-2-90 - CHAKRA MEDITATION - When I got to the yellow, I saw 3 cars come into a parking lot. One had a black man in it, one had two black women in it.  They came in and parked at the ocean's edge. The third car was black and contained a young man. He was deliberately trying to run down another young man who was running, trying to get away from the car. I was told that the driver's name was 'Richard.'


2-5-90 MEDITATION - I went to a high astral energy temple. Edward came but was walking back and forth behind me so I worked on the chakras for myself. He wouldn't settle down.

Between the green and blue, I had a vision of two guys wearing dark blue coveralls. The one who talked to me was going bald and had thin grey hair, probably used to be a blonde. He was trying to lead me down a hallway towards a glass door that was dark beyond it. He said that he was going to help me to go back to being an ordinary normal person because they tended to treat me like a goddess up there. I recalled saying on occasion that I wasn't to be just a normal person, but he said, "That's what we did for Robin. So I said, "No thanks!. I'll stay the way I am, and they went away.


3-9-90 - MEDITATION - I was meditating on the root chakra. I was shown that with regard to past issues, not to blame them on others. They were in a trunk, wrapped in plastic and face down. I was told not to bring them to the forefront and anger over them.


3-16-90 - VISION - While I was doing the chakras, I was switching from Orange to Yellow. A man came in wearing a bright blue cap. He went to a refrigerator, opened the door and a bright white light came on.

I saw a light brown table with red cursive writing on it. It said, "Do not take the labels off of anything. I will make ______ of a dark brown substance when you are done."


4-12-90 - MEDITATION - I wasn't feeling well. I worked on the chakras feeling dizzy and my heart was acting up. I pulled in the color green. I saw a woman dressed all in green. She was carrying a black purse and had black hair. I saw her leave the building I live in. I immediately felt better.


9-12-90 - MEDIATION ON THE CHAKRAS - On the yellow - solar plexus, a voice said, "If there is any blue sludge, let me know."


9-12-90 - MEDITATION - Q. When will the UFOs make contact with the American people in the physical realm? A. "Laramie" "It will be 8/13 and not 24" "Diana Fossler will come out with a book on it in 6 weeks."

I went to the astral healing temple to have my fallopian tube repaired. I saw a long white string pulled out.

Later that day, I did this again and went to the astral healing temple. I saw myself wheeled in to an operating room in a wheelchair and put on an operating table.

In chakra meditation - on the third eye I heard a voice, "There is no purple. I saw many sheets of paper falling down with only partial information on.


11-6-91 - Meditation: I did some chakra balancing work, and when I worked on the crown chakra on myself, I saw my wedding veil. It was in a roll, pure white, and I was handing it to my maid of honor and asking her if she was ready to perform her duty. She said she was. I then asked who I was marrying. I saw a drape being pulled down like a monk's cowl and yellow roses rolled out. A voice said, "We are counting the guest list. Rebecca won't be there. I repeated. "Who am I to marry?" The voice said, "You are to be the Bride of Christ."

Not wanting to be fooled by demons, I said, "I want to see my bridegroom, including the feet." I was shown a man in a tuxedo, but he was transparent. Worrying about my future in the physical, I asked, "Will I be able to have a physical bridegroom too?" The answer came back, "Yes!" I asked, "Who will it be?" The answer came back, "You know who it is." I asked, "Why doesn't he know it?" The answer was, "He is being blinded to it at this time, because of his own personal situation."


2-12-92 - MEDITATION - Question: "Will you help me with the powers and abilities needed to heal the energy flow and chakras of other people?"

A: "You have been specially chosen to do this. You must study it and you will be helped."


5-7-92 - chakra tape meditation. I was told to move to an apartment complex on 113th St. (When a job became available there, I decided I didn't want to go there.)


6-18-92 - DREAM - My "D" bldg at 1339 Jackson street contained five sacred rings of energy. The were shaped like ovals. The two top ones are made of steel and are numbered 535 and 537. There is a master who guards these rings and continuously works to upgrade the lower 3 rings which are now made of wood but eventually will be steel when the energy grows stronger. He must continuously guard against those who would detract from the energy.

In the Bible Concordance:  These are the numbers 535 and 537

535 'amal {aw-mal'} AV - languish , feeble , weak

1) to be weak, to droop, to languish, to be exhausted

1a) (Qal) pass participle (of the heart)

1a1) to be weak

1a2) to droop

1b) (Pulal)

1b1) to be or grow feeble

1b2) to languish

537 'amelal {am-ay-lawl'} AV - feeble 1; 1

1) weak, feeble

I dreamed of this again in 1999:

12-20-99 - DREAM - I worked at a large factory in the office. I lived in a huge apartment building with other people. I came home from work and found a young man dressed all in white standing facing the window. He was keeping score on what was going on out on the street. The people were playing some kind of game and he was keeping track of it. I thought I could probably do it easier with a calculator, but he was doing it by moving five little white rings back and forth. I watched him a bit, but I had visitors, so I had to talk to them.

NOTE: Joe Mason wrote: On October 30, 1990, I awoke from dreaming, and "knew" the meaning of the interlocking rings in a circle. The flower-like shape was a symbol of the Soul, or Oversoul. Each "petal," with a face inside, represents a reincarnational or "focus" personality sent out into space-time. The arrangement beautifully symbolizes the fully integrated Oversoul, the condition that is reached after the reincarnational cycle is finished. The personalities merge into one being, similar to the concept of Nirvana, except their individual personalities are fully retained.

The Oversoul "flowers" are themselves part of another, larger "flower," or circle of hoops, forming a greater "flower" of consciousness. The relationship of "flowers" continues up to the One Great Flower, of the All, or Creative Source.

A paradox exists that is nearly impossible for us to understand in our space-time reality, as it is somewhat of an illusion. In the greater reality, there is no time, so the reincarnational personalities all exist in the eternal Now.

The five rings of the Olympic flag represent the brotherly union of the five continents.

The number five has a peculiar force in sacred explanations: it is everything; it stops the power of poisons, and is redoubted by evil spirits.

The outer five White Rings represent the White Fire Shells of that Battery which consists of the Five Highest Ranges of Frequencies of God's Energy also called the Five Secret Rays, corresponding to our five Secret Chakras.

To confuse the seekers the Luciferians tell them that the Five Secret Rays are in the Center and call them the White Fire Core where God resides, which in fact is the Bottomless Pit (Revelation 20: 3) with steadily declining vibrations and corresponding darkness with weeping and gnashing of teeth.


8-8-92 - ASTRAL PHONE - My astral phone rang with my eyes closed. I said, "Hello " as though in the dream-state, someone said, "We'd like you to meet the judges." One at a time I saw 4 men, each with a headdress on that was ornate, gold, and studded with jewels. In my mind I thought, "They look Egyptian."

I didn't know who these judges were, so I had to look up the names. These names come from: 'Papyrus of Ani; Egyptian Book of the Dead'.

The judges in Egypt are called the Tchatcha Chiefs.

The Tchatcha Chiefs in Anu are: Tem, Shu, Tefnut, [Osiris and Thoth].

The great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Tetu are Osiris, Isis, Nephthys, and Horus the avenger of his father.

The great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Sekhem are Heru-khenti-en- ariti and Thoth who is with the Tchatcha Chiefs of Nerutef.

The great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Pe-Tep are Horus, Isis, Kesta (Mesta) and Hapi.

The great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Taiu-Rekhti are Isis, Horus, Kesta (Mesta) [Anpu and Thoth].

The great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Abtu are Osiris, Isis, and Up-uat

The great Tchatcha Chiefs who are present at the examination of the dead are Thoth, Osiris, Anpu and Asten (read Astes). Now the inspection (or, counting) of those who are to be annihilated signifieth the shutting up of things from the souls of the sons of revolt.

Hail, Thoth, who didst make the word of Osiris true against his enemies, make thou the word of the Osiris the scribe Ani to be true against his enemies, with the great Tchatcha Chiefs who are present at the digging up of the earth [and mixing it] with their blood, and of making the word of Osiris to be true against his enemies.

As concerning the Tchatcha Chiefs who are present at the digging up of the earth in Tetu: When the Smaiu fiends of Set came [there], having transformed themselves into animals, these Tchatcha Chiefs slew them in the presence of the gods who were there, and they took their blood, and carried it to them. These things were permitted at the examination [of the wicked] by those [gods] who dwelt in Tetu.

Hail, Thoth, who didst make the word of Osiris to be true against his enemies, make thou the word of the Osiris [the scribe] Ani to be true against his enemies, with the great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Nerutef on the night of the "Hidden of Forms."

The great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Nerutef are Ra, Osiris, Shu and Bebi.

Now, the night of the "Hidden of Forms" referreth to the placing on the sarcophagus [of Osiris] the arm, the heel, and the thigh of Osiris Un-Nefer.

The Weighing of the Heart

The Book of the Dead of Kenna

1405-1467 BC ]

Joe Mason, who has studied this work more years than I have, states that this is one of the many depictions from the ancient Egyptians showing the heart being weighed against the feather. They believed that, after death, a person is guided to the Judgment Hall for this weighing of the heart. According to James Churchward in The Sacred Symbols of Mu, the feather is said to represent "truth" because it can be so easily blown away. According to Joseph Campbell, in The Inner Reaches of Outer Space, the feather is symbolic of Maat, goddess of the moral order of the universe.

Note the seven spherical nodules along the pole from near the bottom on up to the crossbeam. They are thought to correspond to the seven chakras of the human body. There is another nodule above the beam, which may represent a sphere of timeless consciousness beyond the earth plane.

Note also that the the composite animal's snout cuts across the pole between the third and forth nodules. The platform of the Judgment seat is also at that level. This  seems to indicate the critical point between the third chakra and the forth, the heart chakra.

The baboon on the Judgment seat is one form of the god Thoth, counterpart of the Greek Hermes (Mercury to the Romans), who guides the soul after death. Baboons bark with the rising of the sun.

If the heart weighs more than the feather, the dead soul is devoured by the "Swallower," the composite beast, a mixture of crocodile, hippopotamus, and lion. If the heart is found to be lighter than the feather, the soul is conducted by Toth to Osiris's throne by the Waters of Eternal Life.

Joseph Campbell wrote that in terms of the kundalini, the message could hardly be clearer . . . if the aims of the deceased in life were no higher than those of Chakra three (the animal instincts), the Swallower claims the soul.

The implication is that if one has not reached the heart chakra level of love and compassion during a lifetime, the person must be reborn, that is, reincarnated back on earth, in order to try again. Otherwise, the soul is free to move on to higher planes of existence.

Personally, I believe that Thoth represents a part of the self, probably the Higher Self, and that we "judge" ourselves after death. The decision is made after a "time," to reincarnate or to move on to another plane. " ]

Hail, Thoth, who didst make the word of Osiris true against his enemies, make thou the word of the Osiris, whose word is truth, to be true against his enemies, with the great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Rasta, on the night when Anpu lay with his arms on the things by Osiris, and when the word of Horus was make to be true against his enemies.

The great Tchatcha Chiefs who are in Rasta are Horus, Osiris, and Isis. The heart of Osiris is happy, the heart of Horus is glad, and the two halves of Egypt (Aterti) are well satisfied threat.

Hail, Thoth, who didst make the word of Osiris true against his enemies, make thou the word of the Osiris the scribe Ani, the assessor of the holy offerings made to all the gods, to be true against his enemies, with the Ten great Tchatcha Chiefs who are with Ra, and with Osiris, and with every god, and with every goddess, in the presence of the god Nebertcher. He hath destroyed his enemies, and he hath destroyed every evil thing which appertained to him.

RUBRIC says: If this Chapter be recited for, or over, the deceased, he shall come forth by day, purified after death, according to the desire of his heart. Now if this Chapter be recited over him, he shall progress over the earth, and he shall escape from every fire, and none of the evil things which appertain to him shall ever be round about him; never, a million times over, shall this be.

Those who dwell in Nu have been made wolves, and those who are among the Tchatcha Chiefs have become hyenas.

Names of deities

Bes - music, dance, war, slaughter.

Amon - primordial creation deity; one of 8 gods of chaos; combined with the supreme solar deity, Ra, Amon-RA was the hidden power that created the gods.

Atum - one of 4 creation deities; caused the division of the sexes; as Ra-Atum, he represented the evening sun

Damutef - protect deceased's stomach.

Geb - earth and guide to heaven

Hapi - Nile god.

Hapy - protect deceased's lungs

Horus - sky god whose left eye was the moon and whose right eye was the sun (depicted as an eye); king of Egypt.

Anubis - embalming

Horus - patron deity of Upper (Southern) Egypt

Imsety - protect deceased's liver.

Khensu - moon god

Khnemu, Khnum - one of 4 creator gods; potter who sculpted man and animals and breathed life into them; water god

Min - fertility god who bestowed sexual powers on men

Osiris - earth and vegetation

Ptah - patron of craftsmen

Qebehsenuef - protect deceased's intestines

Re - sun

Seth - lord of Lower Egypt and evil enemy of Horus

Shu - god of space and light between sky & earth; power over snakes; held ladder to heaven

Sobek - crocodile god

Thoth - wisdom and learning - also known as Tahuti by the Greeks


10-20-93 - MEDITATION - I saw that I was wearing a jeweled belt of chakra stones.


11-3-95 - MEDITATION - I was watching a tape by Drunvalo Melchizedek. In the meditation I raised a visualized three inch ball of light from the base chakra, chakra by chakra up to the Pineal gland.

At that level, I created a sphere by sending energy out in 8 different directions and then creating the sphere by connecting the points. When sphere #1 was done, I created a second sphere that half overlapped the lst one.

At that point I felt that I was at a point that was listing to the left and was tipping over. That tipping feeling occurred so quickly, in the physical, I thought I was falling over, I actually had to move my left foot over to catch myself.

After I did, someone handed me a bunch of grapes and laid them on the surface of the sphere. I was told to create a third circle after I visualized my right eyeball lying on the surface of the first circle and looking over the surface of the sphere.

After the third sphere was created, a man appeared who was smiling at me.

At that point the meditation ended.


9-29-98 - DREAM - I and Joe were living in a two story house. (Seemed like Milwaukee) My daughter came to visit, bringing her daughter with her. I noted that my daughter was wearing blue and purple clothing and I told Joe that showed what her aura looked like. Joe said to her, "You ought to wear red clothes, that's more sexual." Then he left the room.

She looked rather stunned. I apologized to her that he had said that and told her that he didn't mean anything bad by that. She started to cry and said that he had hurt her feelings.

I started to explain the colors of the chakras of the body by using rectangles of those same colors on the floor. They looked like flags. I actually explained in in an odd way.

I used the analogy of European country flags and said:

______ purple and white flag means the 'crown chakra'

______ indigo and white flag means the 'third eye chakra'

______ blue and white flag means the 'throat chakra'

______ green and white flag means the 'heart chakra'

I then showed her a silver square on the floor by the kitchen cabinet. I said, "Everyone knows that means "Don't touch".

We went upstairs then because I had to change clothes myself and so did her daughter. Her daughter was wearing a blue/gray dress and I thought a green one would be pretty on her. We were looking through the clothes which were piled on the floor next to the bed. A toy green frog suddenly jumped up in the air and did a little dance. It was kind of cute.

The little girl grabbed a blue dress, pulled it over her head and ran outside without putting underpants on, jumped on her bike which looked like the big wheel kind of the early 1900's and road it out into the street. I saw out the window that a boy, dressed in brown pants and shirt on another bicycle dashed right after her.

My daughter and I ran outside to get her back into the house because she wasn't wearing any underwear. My daughter grabbed her daughter off of her bike and carried her back into the house. I followed behind her. Then my daughter said, "My daughter said she's afraid of your green frog."

I assured her that it was just a toy frog and that it was harmless. I told her, "If Grandpa isn't in the bed, I'll get the frog out of the room." I tiptoed upstairs and the bed was empty, so I began hunting for the frog and my daughter's daughter rummaged through the clothes on the floor and put on a brown pair of corduroy clacks with a white top.

It wasn't the color I would have chosen for her, but we let her go play in that outfit. She was still very young.

I couldn't find the toy frog amongst the clothes, so I kept looking and found it stuffed down in a basket of laundry. My Father had trussed it up with orange ribbon so it looked like a ball of green and orange with frog eyes. We just laughed at it. The frog was no danger to anyone.

NOTE: I had fallen asleep feeling like I had had a cold coming on and I had been sneezing off and on for a couple days. but when I woke up from this dream, I felt fine.


10-6-98 - DREAM - I had 8 separate dreams. Each one was short and seemingly on the computer.The first 7 each was about a separate aspect of a person. The 8th part was the instructions that put the 7 parts together and the spacing between the words described the sacred geometry of how the 7 parts were put together.

When I woke up, I was disappointed that I couldn't remember the parts, only the concept that I had read in the book of Revelations about the 8th belonging to the 7th.

NOTE: Revelations 7: "And the angel said to me, "Wherefore dost thou wonder? I will tell thee the mystery of the woman, and of the beast that carries her which has the seven heads and the ten horns. 8: The beast that thou sawest was, and is not, and is about to come up from the abyss, and will go to destruction. And the inhabitants of the earth - whose names have not been written in the book of life from the foundation of the world - will wonder when they see the beast which was, and is not. 9: And here is the meaning for him who has wisdom The seven heads are seven mountains upon which the woman sits; and they are seven kings; 10: five of them have fallen, one is, and the other has not yet come; and when he comes, he must remain a short time.11: and the beast that was, and is not, is moreover himself eighth, and is of the seven, and is on his way to destruction."

In a writing by Joe Mason, he states: I had a very long dream-coincidence experience with the "11:11" concept. Some of it is quite incredible:

Unlike Solara, in my case it is about Revelation 11:11, where the two olive trees/lampstands/prophets stand up after 3 and 1/2 days of being dead, and a great fear falls on those who see them. It is the mid-point of the seven chakras, and means that humanity will make a leap to the Heart chakra, en mass. In the Egyptian depictions, it is the swallower beast's snout cutting across the pole that supports the balance beam, positioned between the 3rd and 4th nodules of the seven, as is the top of the judgment seat, where Thoth is sitting in the form of a baboon. The swallower is the beast that goes to perdition in Rev. 17:11. It means that karma will end, or be negated in the new cycle, when everyone has reached the Heart chakra level.

The Navaho sand painting called, "The Pollen Path," also is thought to be related. It has a rectangular enclosure with a cornstalk within it. There are seven markers from root to blossom. Footprints show the path along the cornstalk. A bolt of lightning from above strikes at that point, (i.e. the heart chakra level) and a pair of twins descend. (see Joseph Campbell's book).

The Hopi creation myth depicts three chambers underground, where animals develop into humans, and progress upward, with the help of Spider Grandmother. Then, she comes again, this time assisted by birds. (the descent of the Deity into the field of time, according to Campbell. And feathers represented Truth to the Egyptians). Seven humans are shown ascending to the surface and sunlight. The entire shape is like a plant, with the leaves at the surface.

Continuing with the dream:

I fell asleep again and had a dream in which I was in the backyard of my 16th St. house and the snow had fallen during the night and was about a foot deep and was heavy and wet. I knew there was a path under the snow and there was a person behind me on the right who needed to walk on that path. So, I got a shovel and began shoveling the snow on the path. The first few shovelfuls were so heavy, but then I discovered something that put a big smile on my face. Each shovelful became lighter and easier because the snow was melting ahead of me, and the green grass began to show and the sidewalk path became dry and walking on it became easy.

I immediately went into another dream which I knew was a repeat of the first dream and I new that the details of the dream itself weren't important but that each detail described an activity of a human being.

It began where I was standing in front of a bank of 4 elevator doors that were dark green. I was trying to decide which elevator to use; the 2nd or the 4th. They went different speeds, the 4th being faster than the 2nd. However, the 1st elevator came down and it was full of engineers. Noe of them where to go, but their supervisor said, "Don't worry, Dolores will tell you where to go.We immediately got on the 2nd elevator and went upstairs to a large office area. In this area, all the aspects of a person's life were planned out. All the purchase orders and blueprints were brought for the plan of what your life was going to be like. I began to run the blueprints through a desk-like machine. when they came out, they were relief maps of where the person was going to live. These maps were of the United States and each succeeding map was larger but of a smaller area of a mountainous part of the country. They were dark brown and mountainous.

The other activities going on, I was instructed to give four odd objects to a woman who would have to use her imagination and tell everyone else what the options were for the possible use of each item. Another woman was given a typing project to do. She was ready to do it, but she remarked that since their project was known well in advance, she could have been given the project much earlier and not waited until the last second, that the timing of the activity could have been planned and regulated to make it easier for her to accomplish her activity.

Then I went around a corner and there was an ocean there and a girl was sitting in the water. Her blueprint was floating on the water next to her. I moved the blueprint aside. The beautiful water was pristine and clear but on the bottom of the ocean, on the sand were two worms. One was a simple worm which could crawl over to her and bit her if she wasn't looking. The other one was coiled like a snake and had it's head up in the air looking around to see where he could cause a person to lose track of what they were doing.

I went over into the food cafeteria-like area. The boss showed me the refrigerator which was not only full of food, but had secret panels with controls behind them for various aspects of the whole operation. Each panel could be opened and adjustments made if you only knew where they were and what they were for. It was left up to me to find those control panels and make those adjustments for the others.


10-6-98 - VISION - A large chubby boy sat as a big desk. He was given a large chunk of yellow play doh. He sat there and said, "What am I supposed to do with this skunk?"

10-6-98 - VISION - I was sitting at a desk and a man like a doctor or engineer came along to look at my own blueprint. He said, "You've got a lot of work to do." I said, "I don't mind doing work, as long as it's positive."

10-6-98 - VISION - I saw 4 crystal glasses. They were laid out in a Y shape. I put a moonstone or opal into the empty glass on the right with a teaspoon. The bottom most glass was full of dark stuff.

10-6-98 - VISION - A woman from the left came to bring me something that looked like it would be a dark problem, but she became smaller and smaller and crawled under a blue colored cloth full of flowers on the right.

10-7-98 - NOTE: I watched a TV show right before bedtime called "Power of Belief" by John Stossl. I was so upset by its negative coverage, I redreamed the same show 3 times during the night except my dream was all text. I was VERY upset by John Stossl's portrayal of the negative side of belief. He stressed fraud channelers, fraud healing, the comparison of hands-on healing with Voo Doo, suits against alternative healers who promised  cancer cures with the use of coffee enemas, a young 9 year old girl who demonstrated in a science fair that people cannot feel other people's physical energy of their hands, an astrologer who was very popular on the Internet who giggled through the interview and looked stupid and who admitted that astrology was too general, and then he took the 22 page chart of a mass murderer and gave the same chart to a whole class full of people and told them it was theirs. They didn't know they were getting fake charts and they were thrilled to read and see what they were alike and all admitted it was a lot like them.


1-27-99 - DREAM - Joe and I were just starting a new job as manager of a very large building. We lived in the front right corner apartment where everyone came in the front door. There was no door on our apartment.

There was one BIG problem. whenever a woman had a new baby, they put a cot in the corner of our apartment and ALL her relatives came in to visit the new mother and the baby.

Not only did all these people come in unannounced, they moved all our furniture around so they could sit around her bed. This particular women had at least 25 relatives and Joe and I got our own stuff pushed out of the way so they could see the baby.

I thought about asking for a different apartment but this annoyance went with the job so no matter what apartment we would take, the annoyance would go with us.

I got asked by a woman to come down to the basement because they had a new job for me. When I got down there they showed me a complicated machine. The machine made identification badges for everyone to wear. This consisted of placing an aluminum frame around a picture and address card and glue it into a card with a pin to attach to something.

They wanted me to do the gluing job which consisted of an opaque substance called 'crystal' which would turn clear when it dried. I told them didn't know how to do that and they would have to train me. There were 5 women working on this job. They said they would have no problem training me and that I would have to make 10 a day. They showed me how to make one, then asked me to try the glue operation. I used way too much glue at first and they told me that I would have to learn just how much glue to use. I knew immediately I didn't want to do this job. I thanked them for showing me how to do the job and went back upstairs to our apartment. When I got there I sat down at my desk to make a card to insert the address into the identification holder below my picture which had to be hanging above my desk so everyone knew who I was.

I knew I didn't like this whole identification thing either.

I had to go to the bathroom next so I went to the bathroom which was a large public room. Instead of stalls, the toilets were like tall childrens' potties used for training with a pot placed underneath a tall chair with arms and a hole to sit on. The chairs were very colorful, each one a different color, green, yellow, orange, blue, red, purple, all the secondary colors like in a child's crayon box. There was no black or white. This was so emotionally disturbing to me, I was going to tell Joe we HAD to change jobs and move somewhere else.

NOTE: These colors are the colors of the chakras.


8-18-99 - DREAM - I'm not sure what this is. I saw no people, only shapes. The first shapes I saw were circles. I would say there were 7 in each picture. The design on the circle in the circles were so intricate, it would be impossible to describe them or even draw them with any accuracy and no two were alike or even resembled each other.

Later, I either dreamed it again or my brain was trying to explain what I saw but this time, there were no circles, but only rectangles with rounded corners. There were patterns within patterns like crazy quilts.

I keep thinking I was seeing chakras but none of these even faintly resembled any chakra drawings I've ever seen. I have no idea what it was.


1-5-00 - If I get this wrong, the spirit world is going to think I'm awfully dumb :-) I lay down asking the spirit guides to each me something about the Phi ratio: -  DREAM:  The scene took place on a country road.  A young boy came along in a buckboard wagon with big spoke wheels. He came to help us do something. He seemed rather inept though. I was a young girl it seems. My parents said they were going to go to a wedding at 1 p.m. but first they were going to show the boy something and they said they knew a secret. I thought they were going to tell us that the girl getting married was already pregnant.  I looked at the clock when we got to the place where they were going to show the boy the secret and it was 9 a.m. My parents were sitting in the buckboard wagon to my left. I stood up and the boy was now like Roy Rogers and the horse was like Trigger. The horse was like a reddish brown (roan?) with yellowish mane. A palomino?  (Sorry I'm not up on my horse types)  

The horse got in his way and he hollered at the horse, "Get out of my way!" and the horse did.  The young man got up into an umbrella stand like he was going to sing a song to the horse or something. I was watching. The purplish-white  umbrella had the spokes, but no fabric on them so the young man stuck his arms through the spokes and hung on and then lost his balance and the umbrella flipped over with the young man hanging onto the spokes like it was now a wheel.

First I saw the spokes spinning in clockwise direction and they were now like a white spinning wheel.  Then the spokes spun in the counter-clockwise direction. Then the spokes spun in both directions at the same time and I said to myself, "Oh boy! Now they are going to hypnotize me!"

I went into another room while the young man hung on this umbrella thing, and got the notion to masturbate. I was in a dimly lit corner and put my hand down into my shorts. I was surprised to find that I was not female but like a male and I had a small penis. I was again surprised to find out what it felt like for a male to have an orgasm.  

NOTE: Now I have to analyze that while being embarrassed for writing it. :-)

Regarding the spinning wheels:  taken from Helena Blavatsky's Secret Doctrine, "The active Power, the "Perpetual motion of the great Breath," only awakens Kosmos at the dawn of every new Period, setting it into motion by means of the two contrary Forces, and thus casing it to become objective on the plane of Illusion. In other words, that dual motion transfers Kosmos from the plane of the Eternal Ideal into that of finite manifestation, or from the noumenal to the phenomenal plane. Everything that is, was, and will be, eternally is, even the countless forms, which are finite and perishable only in their objective, not in their ideal Form. They existed as Ideas, in the Eternity, and , when they pass away, will exist as reflection. Neither the form of man, not that of any animal, plant or stone has ever been created, and it only on this plane of ours that it commenced 'becoming," i.e. objectivizing into its present materiality, or expanding from within outwards, from the most sublimated and supersensuous essence into its grossest appearance. Therefore our human forms have existed in teh Eternity as astral or ethereal prototypes, according to which models, the Spiritual Beings (or Gods) whose duty it was to bring them into objective beings and terrestrial Life, evolved the protoplasmic forms of the future. Egos from their own essence. After which, when this human Upadhi or basic mould was ready, the natural terrestrial Forces began to work on those supersensuous moulds which contained, because their own, the elements of all the past vegetable and future animal forms of this globe in them. Therefore, man's outward shell passed through every vegetable and animal body before it assumed this human shape."

The centripetal and the centrifugal forces, which are male and female, positive and negative, physical and spiritual, the two being the one Primordial Force. 1`

On 1-6-00 - as I was researching two other things, I saw two pictures similar to the dual spinning wheels. One was of the chakras in a book, and the other was a fibonacci spiral coming out of a torus shape.

1-6-00 - It was a no dream night. However when I was waking up, I was seeing computer files coming down like in a game I play all the time. They were about UFOs and aliens, but I couldn't read them. All of a sudden I had a vision within this screen that said,  LAST HOUR - BUST

Then another screen popped up that was all white, and it said - NEXT HOUR - GOOD - and the files continued to come down but didn't go into the white screen.  

I got up very disappointed. So I went back to bed to dream good stuff. :-)


1-6-00 - DREAM - I was in a room trying to catch two birds similar to parakeets. They were like aqua blue colored bodies with black wings and heads. They were so pretty, I wanted to cage them. However, I was moving slow as molasses with my net, and even when I thought I could catch both birds at the same time because they were so close, I moved so slow, I only got one. The birds looked at me as if it say, "You'll never get us that way!"

NOTE: This blows me away:
Note the color of Shiva's face and that they are two as one.  

NOTE: On 1-18-00 the site was missing, so here is the pic. twoasone.gif

In another scene, I had a baby boy and he was crawling on the floor, playing.  I kept losing track of him because there were so many big brown dogs running around the kitchen. I was afraid they were going to eat the baby, but every time I rushed in there, he was okay. I'd drag him out of there and he'd go right back...  (sounds familiar)  

Finally, my son Ken at about age 8 to 10 came and sat next to me. He was dressed real formally with a long sleeved white shirt and black pants. He looked really great but seemed very thin for his age. He said that his brothers had been beating up on him. I felt bad for him, but can't remember what I did about it.


7-11-01 - DREAM - I don't know how old I was in this dream, but my daughter was about 8 years old. I was going to night-school classes and was taking a match course. I spent most of the time in class just sitting there. I can't remember ever actually looking at the book.

During the day, I was in another class and I started to suspect I was pregnant. I don't recall specific symptoms though. I sat there in class thinking about it. I realized I hadn't had sex with anyone in a long time so how could I be pregnant and started to doubt myself. However, I remembered having sex with multiple men aboard 'the ship'. But then again, how could I tell anyone about that? I was in a real dilemma. I didn't know what to do.

As I sat there in class, it seemed that Todd from One Life to Live TV show was the teacher. He was standing by the wall fiddling with things and acting important.

Dorian Lord Hayes (also from One Life to Live TV show) called on the telephone from Europe and Todd was talking to her a bit. I indicated that I wanted to talk to her. I knew she would understand how I came to be pregnant. Todd knew I wanted to talk to her, but he lay the phone down on a ledge and continued fiddling with things. Then he was going to let me talk to her and he picked up the phone but she had hung up ... tired of waiting on that expensive long-distance all. So I never did get a chance to discuss my possible pregnancy with her.

I had to go home then and get ready for my night class. I walked into my 16th St. house and saw on the clock that it was 20 min. past 8 and class started at 8. My daughter followed me into the house and picked up some things that we stacked by the front door. They looked like small books like children read, similar to Golden Books. On top of them was a plastic see-thru cover of a set of water color paints.

The paints themselves were bright colors in big round circles, reminding me of the chakra colors.

Because I was late for my night class, I decided it didn't really pay to go because it was a 1/2 hour drive to Waukesha just to get to school and if they gave a test, I'd flunk it because I never did any of the work, much less even looked at the book. besides that I was pregnant ... so I decided to drop out of night-school completely.


7-16-01 - DREAM - I was in a city somewhere. I gave a thin black woman my baby to take care of while I was off doing something else for awhile.

I had the head of a red _____ to use for a weapon if I needed meanwhile (can't remember what it is)

I then went to find the black woman and get my baby back. while I was hunting for her, I discovered that the black woman had a huge container of orange juice in her garage that belonged to Joe and she was storing it for him while he was off doing something else.

I finally spotted the black woman. She was walking down the middle of the street. She was carrying my baby in her left arm and selling samples of Joe's orange juice, calling out to customers that the orange was 'some other kind of wine."

I then followed her to where she worked to get my baby back and found her slinging hash in a restaurant.

I went into the restaurant and asked for my baby. She said, "She's right around the corner, being watched, but be prepared to chuckle."

I went around the corner and found an older man sitting in a booth with colorful cards, red, orange, and yellow, laying face down on the table. I don't know what game he was trying to play as the cards were all face down. They were not in any order, but all messed up.

I got my baby and was ready to leave, and then saw that the black woman had the head of a white ____ (animal) to use as a weapon for protection.

As I woke up, the words, "Use it or lose it" came to mind.

I could feel the memory of both animal identities being removed. After thinking about it, it seems that I had a red lion and that it represented the throat chakra but that doesn't make any sense.

NOTE: The woman 'Chandra Levy' came up missing right after this, and the cop investigators said, "The cards are all on the table.' That made me remember this dream.


2-15-01 - DREAM - I was dreaming about all kinds of secret stuff, some was male and some was female. As soon as I woke up, I couldn't remember what it was. :-(

A third dream was also about secret stuff. I met a young man who had maps and graphics posted on his store front window. He congratulated me for doing such a great job on my web site and I told him I thought he did a great job on his store front window as well.

I then went into a store and bought 3 spools of thread ... green, red, and yellow. Along with the thread, the store clerk gave me a receipt that said that this was proof that I needed to give to the first store man since my credit was said to be in jeopardy. I rather chuckled at that, but kept the receipt just in case.

I then went to another place to get some information and when I came out, I was a block in the wrong direction from the first man's store again. I couldn't figure out how I got off in the wrong direction. So, I walked back again.

As I was walking, feeling rather tired, a bus went by. The bus driver knew me or was the store clerk and he hollered out the window of the bus, "Hey! You're supposed to be feeling good!" I laughed and waved my arms vigorously, then as soon as he was gone, I lay down on the sidewalk and feigned exhaustion. I got up again, and went on my way.

The telephone ringing woke me up.

NOTE: I wish I could remember what female stuff was secret. That seemed really interesting. I thought perhaps it was chakras, but men have chakras too.


2-18-02 - I was doing a meditation tape to cleanse and work with the chakras of the body.

As usual, I was having visions while I was listening to the tape.

When we were at the 2nd chakras, I saw a purple page listing the various vertebrae of the body by name. (I had seen a chart like the earlier in the day as well, while reading a book on healing)

A couple of chakras higher, I don't remember which one specifically, I started to feel a burning sensation in one of my lower vertebrae. A thought crossed my mind that I sit at the computer too many hours a day. Instantly I had a vision of a young woman jumping into the air with her arms over her head, dressed like one of the ski racers at the winter Olympics. She had a look of joy on her face like she had just won the gold metal.

By the time the tape was over, my whole lower back at this particular vertebrae was at, was burning so much, I had to roll over on my side until the burning went away.

Earlier in the morning, I had read that this particular vertebrae governs the nerves and circulation of the blood in the ankles and feet and that is exactly where I have an infection on my left inner ankle, and a hug bruise from 4 years ago on my right ankle.


2-19-02 - DREAM - I don't know where I was. It was unfamiliar to me. I graduated from some kind of program and was given a diploma.

I didn't look like real life either - about 20 to 30 years younger and had beautiful long curly hair.

I decided to take a shower before going to work. It seems I didn't get wet though and the shower was like in a glass cabinet made of wood and glass.

After my shower, I starting opening doors for a huge party to celebrate the graduation. I opened many side by side doors of the wood and glass. in this huge room, along the walls were all the cabinets of wood and glass which had the serving dishes for the party and when the guests arrived, they were all wearing tuxedos and gowns and most of the women and men were wearing crowns like Kings, queens, princes, and princesses.

I then continued opening doors on different levels but these doors were an odd shade of light to medium blue and were numbered.

I woke up because I was cold and all the blankets were on Joe's side of the bed.

NOTE: The crowns on the people's heads might have represented the crown chakras.


11-13-01 - DREAM - I was sitting in a bedroom office writing and my Father came in from out in the garage. He put a multicolored afghan over my shoulders - like the one I sit on in the car which I call 'my afghan of many colors' i made it to meditate with because it has all the chakra colors. He also brought in the mail. There was an envelope addressed to Great Dreams Publications and a roll of stamps. In the envelope was a crisp new $1 bill. I told him I had entered one of those round-robin contests where I sent $1 to someone and now I was getting repaid by others. He also gave me a bicycle to ride which I rode inside of a grid-like structure full of plants.

I was then typing on my keyboard at the computer and there were beautiful vines growing in the keyboard. It was hard to type because of the vine but they were really beautiful.

My Father also came into my yard then with a vial of water, which I used to water a fruit tree which was blooming there. The flowers on the fruit tree were white. There were some down low on the trunk as well as in the branches. I watered the tree very carefully so it would keep blooming. My Father was riding in a big old light brown car like a model T and it seemed like he had a chauffeur because he was sitting in the back seat.

While my Father sat in the office with me, I also told him my whole Ted Danson flood dream.

I'm not sure if my Father gave me a black and green striped T shirt or if it was someone else, but it was slipped on over my head, over my other clothes. I was then told to raise my right arm.

Then my son Tom and a whole bunch of other kids and older people came in. All the young people were wearing the same green and black stripped T shifts and black pants or skirts.

Some of the older men were just watching and didn't have their shirts on yet. They were observing on the sidelines like I was. My son Tom and all the other young people formed a ring around a huge rectangular table, raised their right arms and danced around this table in a circle. It was a ritual dance of some kind.

I was then in my bedroom and my son Tom and another young man came in and sat on the edge of the bed and again I told the dream about Ted Danson and the 450 foot flood.


4-22-02 - DREAM - I was stuffing quarters into a gambling machine. I put in $40 and finally won and got $50 back. I overheard someone say that the ratio was 47 to 74.

50 is the total number of petals on the first 6 chakras. 50 is also the number for ENLIL, the second son of God EA/ENKI

47 and 74 are mirror images. 47+74= 121 which is 11 x 11


3-28-03 - DREAM - I was dreaming that I was breathing through two narrow straws and that my heart wasn't beating right and that I should go to the doctor and have it checked.

As I was waking up, I had a vision of a series of lollipops going by me in 7 groups of colors in the shades of the chakras. There were several large ones, and the some small ones of each color. At first I thought there were perhaps 7 of each color, but because there were some small ones also, there may have been a couple more than that.

I woke up and my nose was stuffy and my throat was almost clogged shut and my heart was racing and thready. I fell asleep for a couple of moments and woke up and my heart was pounding and my throat was full of mucous again and I had to keep clearing it to breath.