DEES DREAMS AND VISIONS

NOVEMBER, 2009

11-1-09 - DREAM - I was working in the office of a large school.  It was near the end of the school day and we were talking about our plans for the evening.

I had a large pot of plants similar to grass, the soil was wet, but some of the plants looked like they had been sat on by something, and the plants were crushed down into the soil and stuck there, but the odd thing was that some plants were stuck down to the right, and some to the left which seemed impossible.  I couldn't figure out how that was possible to do, but I knew too that I was going to have to lift each leaf carefully out of the soil so they were standing upright again.

I was carrying this pot to a safer place near to where I sat during the day, and while I was doing that, I looked out the window and saw a huge man - at least 20 feet tall, lumbering through the school yard on the lawn.  He wasn't very pleasant looking and I was afraid that he was looking for a way to get into the school, and I immediately got scared because other people were leaving and I would be there all alone.

I ran through the school hallway, trying to find a safe room from the tall man if he came into the building, and then woke up to a vision in which I saw that I was in a city on a hill.

CITY ON A HILL: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/City_upon_a_Hill

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11-2-09 - DREAM - My husband and I went to a bar/restaurant for dinner.  We were sitting at a round table near the dance floor, when someone announced that they were going to have a dance contest between three women just for fun.

When he said that, I knew I was going to get picked, and I looked down at my blouse and saw that two of the buttons had frazzled button holes and that if I did the kind of dance they were going to want, my buttons might pop open and I'd win just for that reason.

Then I heard him call my name as one of the three and he called me, "Dee", and I stood up. 

The announcer said, I want you three women to just stand where you are and revolve your hips like this, and he did for the audience what he wanted us to do.

The scene immediately switched and I was sitting in a car - on the passenger side at the curb near 70th & Greenfield.  My little brother came up to the car. He was about 8 years old.  He wanted to buy some candy, so I got some dollar bills out and counted out $6 dollars and gave it to him in his hand and then kissed him on the mouth in a sisterly way (for me it was sisterly).  But a young came   by (I didn't actually see him) but the man started making nasty remarks about me giving money to a little boy, like I was paying him to do something for me.

Just then a cop came along and started ragging on the young man for bothering me and my brother.  I had already thought about what I was going to say to the cop  I was going to ask him where the drug store was that used to be on the corner that my little brother wanted to buy himself some candy. I knew the cop would see that we were brother and sister if he was a decent cop.

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11-3-09 - DREAM - In this dream, I found the answer to a nap dream I had yesterday about 3 cats in a game or ceremony which I couldn't remember.

I was looking through a book about Egyptian ceremonies when I came across the information about the 3 cats.  The book was a large size - about 16" x 14" - not very thick.  I was surprised to come across this information and recognized it immediately as being the same as my dream.

That meant that I had to do the ceremony which involved giving my dog Lily a shower and then taking her to the doctor.

There was a tall, thin black woman with me at the doctor's office with her dog as well, who also was to participate in this ceremony.  The doctor gave her a check for $134 to cover her costs.  I wasn't given any money at all.  There was no reason given for why she got money and I didn't.

I woke up as I was giving my dog a shower and washing her down by hand.  She was really good about standing still in the shower.  I just wondered how the other people would feel about taking the dog into a human doctor's office.

Here is the Egyptian connection:

THE TEMPLE AT KARNAK

For the largely uneducated ancient Egyptian population this could only have been the place of the gods. It is the mother of all religious buildings, the largest ever made and a place of pilgrimage for nearly 4,000 years. Although today's pilgrims are mainly tourists. It covers about 200 acres 1.5km by 0.8km The area of the sacred enclosure of Amon alone is 61 acres and would hold ten average European cathedrals. The great temple at the heart of Karnak is so big, St Peter's, Milan and Notre Dame Cathedrals could be lost within its walls. The Hypostyle hall at 54,000 square feet with its 134 columns is still the largest room of any religious building in the world. In addition to the main sanctuary there are several smaller temples and a vast sacred lake.

Karnak is the home of the god Amon who was an insignificant local god until the 12th dynasty when Thebes became the capital of Egypt. He was represented in his original state as a goose and later as a ram, at the height of his power he was shown as a human with a head dress of feathers - all that remained of the goose.

In ancient times wars were not fought between countries but were considered as contests between gods. One deity subduing and replacing another, the victorious god and its people growing in strength. This is how Amon, with the help of Thutmose III and various other New Kingdom kings, rose to become the first supreme god of the known world and was hailed as God of gods. Little is know of him, unlike most other gods he has no legends or miracles to impress his worshippers and seems to be closer to an abstract idea of a godhead. His followers came from all the strata of society and he was known to some as 'Vizier of the poor.'

All Egyptian temples had a sacred lake, Karnak's is the largest. It was used during festivals when images of the gods would sail across it on golden barges. Karnak was also the home of a flock of geese dedicated to Amon.

The Eastern Gateway which once lead to a huge temple built by Akhenaten (the heretic king). In an attempt to obliterate his memory, Akhenaten's enemies destroyed this shrine after his death

See this too:  http://www.greatdreams.com/cosmic/101706.htm

Psalm 134

A Song of Ascents.

 134:1Look! Praise Yahweh, all you servants of Yahweh,
      Who stand by night in Yahweh's house!

 134:2Lift up your hands in the sanctuary.
      Praise Yahweh!

 134:3May Yahweh bless you from Zion;
      Even he who made heaven and earth.

THE NUMBER IS IN KISSES-INITIATION:  http://www.greatdreams.com/sacred/kisses-initiation.htm

O Moses! Pray for us to your Lord - He has covenant with you -- 7: 134;

   -  When We removed the terror -- they broke their covenant -- 7: 135;

from: http://www.greatdreams.com/sacred/three_covenants.htm

11-3-09 - I was listening to a radio show about MIB and Reptilians with John Rhodes on coasttocoastam.com   I got so tired I had to stop the show and go lay down on the couch.

11-3-09 - NAP DREAM - I seemed to be standing at the same table as I was in yesterday's forgotten dream.  I went to serve some kind of light blue liquid, (sky color) and accidentally bumped the edge of the glass with something.  Since the glass was full of the blue liquid and the bumping created a large V chip to come out of the glass, the blue liquid came pouring out of the glass.  I grabbed a tissue and started sopping up the blue liquid from the top of the table, but the blue liquid didn't stop running out when it reached the bottom of the V shape break in the glass, it kept right on running out.  I had to think then that the glass was cracked all the way to bottom starting at the bottom of the V on downward.

I woke up and this vision:

11-3-09 - VISION -  a sign that said, "The 10 Step Parenting Plan to Green _______  (living)?

GREEN LIVING: http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=ISO-8859-1&q=%22green+living%22+-autism+-bagoholic+-bagaholic

In the beginning of Creation, something went wrong. The shattering of the vessel  - The vessels cannot be filled from the top. The vessels have to be filled from the bottom.  The sphere on the Tree of Life that means Victory - is NETZACH.  It is the seventh sphere located on the right (male side).
It corresponds to the hips and left on the human body. (If you are inside the tree looking out).  Venus - instincts, emotions, thought forms of the group mind.  Illusionary plane. Seat of the generated organs.

Looking up into the Tree of Life, the Olam appears sky blue.

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11-3-09 - AFTERNOON NAP DREAM.  I hate it that these dreams fade so fast even after you think you remember it.

All I remember is that it seems like I was given a new vehicle that was Egyptian, and I saw something parked at the curb - and there was a series of 3 x's time nine in a row.

Beyond that I have no clue.

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11-4-09 - DREAM - I was in a room looking at a book about UFOs that was on a round table. I was told to get a book about UFOs from Kalmbach Publishing.

[I'm pretty sure they are in  Waukesha, Wisconsin]

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11-4-09 - -NAP DREAM - This was like 3 dreams, but the most important one was that my husband and I were going to go look at a house for sale on Martin Rd.  We were driving south on 108th St. (Hwy 100) and the hill was so steep downward it was like being on the tallest roller coaster in the world.  (Reminds me of coming down the hill from Truckee, CA into the Valley east of San Francisco)  When we got to the bottom we had to stop at a tow truck repair place where they looked at our car and said we nearly ruined our brakes coming down the hill.  I had been more worried about hitting the kids playing in the road at the bottom of the hill.

I was waiting for my husband to gather his camera equipment and other stuff as we left the restaurant at the car repair place and got permission to drive again, and I sat outside on the lawn while waiting, and I could hear a traffic report on a radio somewhere off in the distance and I opened my eyes, and I could see San Francisco off to the west and could see that it was foggy in that direction, but sunny where I was.  I was awestruck by how tall the buildings were, because I had never seen them before.  It was a beautiful site even though we weren't going that far.

I was sorting out flowers from a bundle of flowers.  They all had long stems and were all beautiful.  It made a beautiful bouquet.

I really wanted to get going to see the house.

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11-4-09 - VISION -  I saw a tightly knit group of men, all facing away from me - all were wearing uniforms with white pants and red and white long sleeved knit shirts.

I assumed it was a baseball team. I was assuming it was telling me that the Yankees won the series.  When I looked up the uniforms on google.- images, the Yankees were wearing blue-gray uniforms. 

Here is the shirt: 

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11-5-09 - VISION -  GRAIL OF THE GREAT KING

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11-5-09 - DREAM - I had a job as Manager of a large building.  We had a new boss I had never met before. Her name was Mrs. Cabot and she was expecting twin girls.

In this building, we got two electric bills and I was told that the meters were behind the white door in the laundry room.

When I was going to leave the building, I decided not to because there were no street lights on outside and it was dark out.  Inside the building, there wasn't much light either, but one room where Mrs. Cabot was holding reign, it was brightly lit and I could hear a radio playing with the news.

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11-5-09 - As I was going to sleep, I had been saying affirmations about being allowed to increase the acuity of my color spectrum.  I went into a vision where there was a white man wearing a long sleeved white shirt, and a black man who was lounging in a chair next to me.  But the black man got right up into my face and started talking to me, but I don't know what he said because he wasn't speaking English.  I don't know what language it was.  I got the impression that he was telling me that what I was asking for was a lot to desire and that being able to see more of the color spectrum brought other things with it that weren't so pleasant.

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11-6-09 - DREAM -  I was in the bedroom talking on the telephone for quite some time with someone (probably Becky)  Evidently when I was on the phone, someone had beeped in but I didn't answer it (thats what happened last night for real)

When I hung up the phone, I called Joe's son Mike -  Joe was sitting on the bed where I usually sit -  we were in reversed places on the bed from normal.

When Mike answered, I cheerfully said Hello, and then handed the phone to Joe.  The voices were really loud so I could hear what Mike was saying.

As Mike was talking, someone else was telling him something on the side.

Mike said, "He died at 5 p.m.  He was the Captain of the team.  The baby assisted. "

I woke up at that point, so we didn't find out who had died.

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11-7-09 - DREAM - I was watching a pink, yellow, and white grid.  On this grid were the letters, p, y, and f, and some figures I don't recall. I was rearranging the letters in a pattern that matched - not so random.  Then, in the bottom row, I saw some cartoonish figures -  a tall thin man, a shorter fat man, and some kind of animal - like donkey or a deer.

I woke up at precisely 3:30 a.m.

I went to the bathroom and then back to bed, not caring if I remembered the dream or not.

DREAM 2.  I was working on a computer, and there was on the screen at the far upper right, a little square with 2 figures in it - a silver ball and an animal like a tiny monkey or something, and the instructions were to slide the monkey into the ball to open the program which I did.

The program brought up some typing I had done long ago  (I actually remember this program from a previous dream a long time ago)  At this point, I had a cream colored square box which I could point at the screen and make the type larger or smaller as desired, which I started to do, but a man came into the room behind me and I didn't want them to see what I had typed, so I shut the program off.

I went into the kitchen with the man and there was another computer there, and there was a woman there who was having trouble seeing the screen. I thought my program on the other computer would really help her, but it wasn't installed on this computer, and my cream colored gizmo wouldn't work without the program,, so I couldn't help her.

I decided to go outside, which  I did without putting on my shoes.  So, I was outside, barefoot, and a trash truck came down the road toward me.  For some reason, I didn't trust the guy driving the truck, so I walked off into the woods which was all deep sandy type soil.  It was soft and didn't hurt my feet.  As I walked along between the trees, I saw a red and white house in the distance and some women or girls behind it, so I headed for that building.

When I got there, there was a young woman out back, and when I walked up to her and she asked me what I wanted, I told her I was looking for the restaurant.

She said, "Well, this is it!  Come on in!"

I walked into the building with her, feeling my pockets and realizing that I had no money with me so I couldn't buy anything.

We walked into the dining room, and I was feeling rather weak from the walk and not eating anything prior to that, so I sat down at a table.

At the next table, a family was having breakfast, and their meal was huge, starting with a huge bowl of soup with a tomato base, and vegetables in it, and there was platters of eggs, sausage, rectangular pieces of baloney, all kinds of things.  It was a huge meal.

I remembered I had no money to buy anything, and I didn't want to beg for some of their food.  I looked at the rectangular pieces of baloney and wondered if I could snag one - just enough to get my energy back enough to walk home.

I think I woke up enough to realize I was hungry, but fell back asleep again.

I was then walking back home and discovered that the trash man had just knocked over our trash bucket and didn't pick it up again.  I remember seeing pink sponges in it, scattered about. 

Somehow, I got into a school bus and the young driver took me to the school, where we saw trash buckets knocked over there too.  The driver missed the driveway by a few feet, backed up and went into a driveway and then into a long garage, where I saw sky blue colored sponges.  He said he would make sure all that garbage with the pink sponges would get picked up, using a different trash pickup truck, and he did.

I woke up at precisely 5:30 a.m. to a vision in which Joe was answering the bedroom phone while I was coming out of the bathroom, and asking who was calling. 

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11-8-09 - DREAM - I went to the dentist office before 8 a.m.  (I saw the clock on the wall in his office)  I had walked there.  I lay on an exam table like a doctor's office.  He had several of these cots in the room.  As I lay on the cot, he took my glasses off of me and stood really close to me, cleaning my glasses and telling me how to take care of them.  Then he started plucking my right eyebrow with a tweezers. 

The dentist was really handsome and I realize now that he looked like Dr. Brian that Joe goes to - a physician's assistant in his 40's.  I knew at that point I wanted to have an affair with him but didn't know how he felt.  He went over to another table and I heard him doing some grinding like a dentist might do out of the room.  Meanwhile the television was on - a very large screen - and the gay male couple from 'As the World Turns' was on the screen and they were laughing about something.  I said loudly, "I love those guys!" and laughed  

He kept on grinding and I knew that his nurse was in the room also - a very young woman.  There was a book there - pale brown - and some of seemed to be in French -  at least I saw several columns that started with Fr4 -  and towards the back of the book was a long math problem that started with 3.9 x 15 - the problem went all the way down to the bottom of the page.

I called over to the doctor and pointed out the math problem and said, "This looks like my 5th grade math book," and laughed.  He came over and pointed out the last 5 lines on the page where some long numbers were added together.  He said, "These last calculations are wrong." and smiled. 

I was amazed that someone would publish a book with the wrong math calculations in it.  I was determined to go home and find my 5th grade math book and prove that it was the same problem published in my book. 

He then said, "I'll drive you to the airport so you can pick up your car and then we can drive back here! -  then he picked up an almost empty package of napkins and said, "This is how our relationship is probably going to end!"  and I disagreed with him and said, "No!  It isn't!"  (I assumed he meant that our relationship was going to end in tears.  (I have no idea why he thought my car was at the airport - I knew I had walked there from home)

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11-8-09 - VISIONS while watching Flashforward TV show and taking notes.  I saw a block wall with a small window in it and a fly and a white moth came from the left and landed on the wall.   I knew I was supposed to stop there and I'm glad I did after watching the rest of the show.  There were things on that show I wasn't supposed to promote by writing them down.

I then started having other visions about myself:

I saw a large piece of white drawing paper with a scene of trees and blue sky.  Someone from the left was pointing to the trees.  The voice said, "Seeing this does not guarantee staying in this house!"

I saw my left hand with 5 silver rings with intricate silver scroll work covering most of my fingers and hand.  The voice said, "Seeing this does not always guarantee seeing the future!"

I saw a large book - it was turned open to the index of all the events listed in the book.  There was a small picture of a man on the last page. 

I saw a man in the future - off in the distance  the voice said, "Next!!!  The 11 events.

I saw a piece of paper with a list of events to come. There were about 5 or 6.  I was told. "This is your future.!"

I then saw a beautiful yellow lily fully open in bloom.

NOTE; Every time I close my eyes, I can feel my crown chakra opening and the psychic horns forming.  If I keep my eyes closed, I begin to see a whole bunch of visions.  This is a good thing, but when I'm on the computer or watching TV, I am prevented from listening to or watching certain things because they want to interrupt me so they can send me messages like the above.

Is this good or bad?  It can be both!  Just like in the Flashforward

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11-9-09 - DREAM -  Only the ending of this dream is important.  I was out in the country, quite a distance from the house.  I could see a large black plume of smoke coming up into the air from a point in the south.  The smoke was very visible overhead but since it was thundering now and then, it just looked like storm clouds, not like smoke.  But I was so far away from the house, I couldn't warn anyone about the smoke coming from the south.

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11-9-09 - DREAM - I was living by myself in an apartment.  It was late afternoon and I got a phone call from my daughter-in-law Becky in which she was telling me that she had lost so much weight, her clothes no longer fit her (that was a real conversation from several days ago)

But, then two nurses came to my apartment to check on me, and I apologized for being in a 'foggy' mental state, and I wasn't ready for them.

They sat down to talk about my health anyway, but I kept getting interrupted by phone calls.

I got a call from the office - it sounded like my friend Ruth - (who I actually never worked with) and she connected me to an Indian engineer, who gave me some details about some steel he was working with and he said he had only gotten it to 3,000 degrees, and promised he'd be able to get the temperature higher next time.  He gave me his name as Sanakada (s;?)  It wasn't long and he came to the apartment too.

By then it was 5 p.m.  The nurses questioned me about my posture while on the phone because I was hunched over writing on the paper while taking notes, and they wanted to know how I could work like that.

At the same time, the Indian engineer came to the apartment, and he wanted to know how we Americans can work without eating regularly, and I tried to explain to him that we had to cover the office so some people go to lunch at 11:30 a.m., some at noon, and some at 12:30 p.m. so there is always someone in the office.

end

Joe tells me that steel melts at about 1800 degrees. But that depends on the environment around it, each type of environment changes the melting point.

Steel at 3,000 degrees - http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=navclient&ie=UTF-8&rlz=1T4PALA_enUS204US335&q=steel+3000+degrees

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11-10-09 - I had two brief dreams that were related to the Egyptians, but the last one had a scene where a fancy dressed woman got into an old-fashioned car - supposedly to go pick Pomegranates, and a dapper man jumped into the rumble seat of the car and he called the insides of the pomegranates hipsters and said he loved them, and I woke up thinking he used the number 17 in relation to the pomegranates.  While he was in the rumble seat, he was whispering to the woman in the car through the window.  She probably could hear him audibly, but perhaps telepathically.

See: http://www.greatdreams.com/seventeen/pomegranate.htm

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11-11-09 - DREAM -  I was living in an apartment.  A man and a woman came to visit.  The man said he didn't know what was wrong with him. All of a sudden he just wanted to sit around and be with family - he didn't want to travel or go out anymore.  I offered him a bag of potato chips, in which were two kinds of potato chips and a bag of popcorn.  The woman said she preferred something fresh - not specifying what that might be.

I went into the kitchen to cook something, and turn on the gas burners on the stove.  The gas came on, but it wouldn't light, so I quickly used the handles of a couple forks to turn off the burners because I was afraid the flame might come on while I was turning off the burners, which I had to do in the center of the burner - not from a knob on the front of the stove.

When I turned the left burner, the knob broke off.  I called it a Cobra.

I went back in the livingroom, and the woman went into the kitchen to find herself something to eat.  She didn't come back, so I yelled in there if she needed some help and she said she needed some butter.  I knew there was a tub of make believe butter on the shelf, and a stick of real butter on the small shelf of the door, so I got up to go get it for her.

Meanwhile my husband came home and he wanted to go to the real estate office and find somewhere new to live.  We were almost at the real estate office, which I remembered that I hadn't brought my purse,  So I started walking back to the apartment to get my purse.  He waited at the real estate office with a copy of the newspaper classified ads. 

I had quite a distance to walk across this large parking lot, walk around a row of cars, then walk around a large rain puddle.   All of a sudden I met myself coming towards me, bringing me my ring of keys.

That surprised me so much, I woke up.

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11-12-09 - DREAM - I was working on a computer, making a grid-like page about people.  (I didn't realize until I woke up that it was a genealogy page).  It had small photos of the person, followed by a very short description and didn't allow for long words, just little short descriptions.

I then went outside and got into a beautiful large bright yellow car, and drove it like it was my first time driving.  I had a real hard time turning corners with it.  But I managed to drive it down the road to our new house.

As it turned out, I loved the house and property.  It was out in the country - a large farm house.  Apparently I did all the work myself, and mowed the lawn too low, and vowed that next time I mowed, I would raise the mower up a bit so it didn't leave grooves in the lawn.

I was out in the driveway, using a hose to wash the dirt aside when a car pulled up, and I recognized the woman who got out -  it was the same woman from my computer page - my mother-in-law.  She was never that thin in real life, and I wondered if my husband would even recognize her.

We went up some stairs into the kitchen where my lst husband (Jim) was sitting at the kitchen table eating a sandwich.  He looked up and said lovingly to the woman,  "Mom!!!!"  and he got up and hugged her.

A few moments later, we went into the huge livingroom that had a really high ceilings maybe like 14 or 16 feet high, and a narrow open stairway to the second floor where the bedrooms were.

That's where I woke up, feeling happy to have such a beautiful place to live.

NOTE:  That house was totally unlike what Joe and I want to live in - a one story house - ranch style - with no stairs in it.

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11-14-09 - DREAM - I was with two high-school chums  Jay and Norman.  They came to my house to visit, but were more palling around with each other in my presence.  There were only two chairs in my kitchen, Jay sat on one and I sat on one, so when Norman wanted to sit down , I offered him my lap to sit on.  I put my hand on his right butt cheek and all I could feel was his fat wallet. 

The two guys then went into the livingroom, and somehow, all of Norman's mother's possessions were in my livingroom.  Jay was cleaning the carpet, and Norman was crawling on the floor was using his mother's vases as toys, knocking them over playfully, and setting them back up again.  He did that several times until I scolded him and told him his mother would be really upset if she could see him do that.

We then went out to the car to go to the east side to buy some electronic parts to repair a radio.  The parts are the little colored things that connect inside radios. (forgotten what they are called)  I was sitting in the front seat alone.  Jay was driving from the second seat, and Norman was riding along in the third seat.

We were driving east on Walnut street which was all businesses.  The street was marked off so east bound traffic had a very narrow lane, just barely wide enough for a car, and the west bound lane was wide enough to handle large trucks, most of which were 18 wheelers, but there were a lot of large box-like trucks as well - all hauling goods for people. They were all going west.

I heard Jay mention Green Bay Ave, and I could see traffic going north on Green Bay Ave. very fast.

We then went back home (I don't remember ever being in a store to buy the radio repair parts)  Both men (they were in their 20's)  had horns on their heads, one behind the other like a rhinoceros snout, but the size of large male goats.  That didn't seem unusual until after I woke up.

NOTE: The only time I ever saw the two friends together was at my graduation party in 1956.  I have a photo of them with their arms around my shoulders - one standing on each side of me.

   

Both men had their horns on top of their head - the rhino's horns are too tall in front and too short in back - but not on their forehead - but on top of the head.

Bartsch 74, monogram lower center. An impression from the 1511 Latin Text edition, with the Flower and Triangle watermark (Meder watermark 127). A superb impression in excellent condition, trimmed just outside, on or in places just inside the borderline, some very light staining, archival window mat. This woodcut depicts Revelation 13: (1) Then I saw a beast come up from the sea with ten horns and seven heads, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the names of blasphemy... (11) And then I saw another beast coming out of the ground, and he had two horns like a lamb and spoke like a dragon. (13) And he prompted great portents, even that fire pour down from the sky to the earth for all men to see. (14) And I looked, and beheld a white cloud, and sitting upon the cloud one who was like the Son of Man, wearing upon his head a crown of gold, and in his hands a sharp sickle. (17) And another angel came out of the temple which is in heaven, he is also having a sharp sickle.
PROVENANCE:  P & D Colnaghi; Knoedler and Company (with their stock numbers verso), ex. Collection Jeffrey Weiss, Dallas, Texas.
 

11-14-09 - MEDITATION on the two horns. 

VISION:  I was going through a newspaper on the third page inside, was a full length photo of an old woman playing a clarinet.

Review

To God is a short, intense duo written by French composer Pascal Dusapin for members of Ensemble 'Accroche-Note. Over a period of a decade or more, he wrote a whole series of solo and chamber works for these musicians, developing a very close musical relationship with them and their instruments. In this piece, the soprano voice is combined with a clarinet. The voice generally sings with minimal vibrato in order to blend better with the instrumental tone. In fact, the two start out together, in unison. The lines start to pull apart, however, and by the end of the first part, the voice is soaring up in her extreme high range over a pedal tone in the clarinet.

To God falls clearly into two parts. The first is forceful, the second relaxed. In fact, the voice in the last half of the piece sings gently, as if crooning a lullaby, while the clarinet quietly spins a contrapuntal weave around the voice. The text is a fragment from William Blake (sung in French): "If you have form'd a circle to go into, Go into it yourself and see how you would do." At five minutes, To God is a brief meditation on this text. The music may reflect the words in the sense of the two performers beginning together, then gradually diverging their paths, first the voice circling away from the clarinet in the first part, then the clarinet meandering around the simpler melody of the voice in the second part. ~ All Music Guide
 
Galina Ustvolskaya

born 1919

in Russia

Until very recently, the music of reclusive St Petersburg composer Galina Ustvolskaya (born 17th June 1919) had hardly been heard in Russia, let alone in the West. Five years ago, it was impossible to obtain any of it on compact disc; indeed only two of her works had been recorded in the Soviet Union by 1970 and these were known solely to connoisseurs of the nether regions of the Melodiya catalogue. Ironically both of these pieces have since been repudiated by the composer.

Things began to change in 1992-3 with the earliest foreign recordings and the simultaneous appearance of the first Western documentation of her controversial relationship with Shostakovich. To date, Ustvolskaya's compact discography shows her to be an artist of stubborn self-will uniquely unsuited to a career in the Soviet music service. Quite apart from its individual integrity, her work is driven by a spiritual ideal which would have placed her in diametrical opposition to the Communist state.

For one reason or another, the pursuit of her personal vision excluded Ustvolskaya from mainstream musical life in the USSR. Her music was performed at the Warsaw Autumn Festival during the late Fifties but, at home, she tended to be bracketed with Andrei Volkonsky (a cosmopolitan enfant terrible modernist) as largely beyond the pale. Not that this exclusion was total. For example, her Violin Sonata of 1952 seems to have been officially adopted as a token of the acceptable face of Soviet modernism, being played in 1958 to a visiting American delegation (including the composer Roy Harris who found it "kind of ugly") and trotted out again in 1962 to a party headed by Stravinsky, Robert Craft, and Nicolas Slonimsky. Nor was Ustvolskaya otherwise quite as heroically neglected as some Western idealists have fondly hoped.


Here, as in other aspects of foreign acquaintance with Soviet life, misapprehensions abound. For example, Mark Swed's liner note for David Arden's disc on Koch attempts to portray Shostakovich as an evasive "neurotic" scared openly to challenge the Socialist Realist status quo, as compared with the supposedly uncompromising Ustvolskaya, who was allegedly always "direct and boldly dramatic" and whose art "pulls no punches". Taking a similar line in his notes to Reinbert de Leeuw's hatART CD, Art Lange claims "no evidence of Ustvolskaya compromising with the Party line - she never stooped to writing secular cantatas or programmatically accessible music for theatre or films, or to using recognizable folk material in glibly popular ways".

Had Ustvolskaya really maintained such a stand throughout her career, she would have been unique in the world of Soviet music (not to mention uniquely hungry, in that she would have had no income). In fact the truth, like Soviet reality, was harder than most Western pundits are used to imagining. Ustvolskaya, like any other artist in the USSR needed to live, and to live she had to come to an arrangement with the state.

A more informed commentator, Boris Schwarz, observed in 1972 (Music and Musical Life in Soviet Russia, p. 404) that while Ustvolskaya's Violin Sonata was then regarded as "proof that modernism can survive and coexist with Socialist Realism", the truth was that "her dissonant writing is counterbalanced by some perfectly charming pieces in the best Socialist Realist tradition". Among these "charming" pieces are some occasional cantatas - Stepan Razin's Dream (1948), Hail, Youth! (1950), Dawn Over The Homeland (1952), Man From The High Mountains (1952), Song of Praise (1961) - and several symphonic poems, including Young Pioneers (1950), Children's Suite (1955), The Hero's Exploit (1957), Sports (1958), and Fire on the Steppes (1958). There are also a number of songs and even some cinema music.


A need for purity

The existence of these works is no scandal in itself. Every other "Soviet" composer has similar embarrassing necessities to his or her name. True, Ustvolskaya packed an unusual quantity of these monstrosities into the early part of her career - she seems to have offered up more sops to the Soviet state in one decade than Shostakovich did in five - yet the scorching intensity of her personal "for the drawer" composing is more than sufficient to show that she can only have submitted to these compromises because she had to. Moreover in Ustvolskaya's case there remains a special point of interest. The reason why Mark Swed, Art Lange, and other Western commentators have overlooked her many reluctant contributions to Socialist Realism is that, unlike Shostakovich, who kept his forced concessions in his opus list for all to see, Ustvolskaya has chosen to eliminate hers in order to keep her oeuvre ostensibly pure.

Speaking of her Clarinet Trio of 1949, the composer has said that "all my music from this composition onward is 'spiritual' in nature". Whatever else this implies, it means that all but one of the ten manifestly unspiritual works listed above are, by definition, not her music. This is both understandable and fair. No one of creative spirit wishes to dwell on hackwork done under political duress - and nor should they be made to. (The fact that, until recently, the Children's Suite and Fire on the Steppes were the only works of Ustvolskaya which Melodiya deemed worthy of recording must have added insult to injury, notwithstanding the much-needed roubles accruing to her thereby.)

What remains significant is that the composer could so little tolerate sullying her list with these pieces that she took the quasi-Stalinist step of erasing them from her personal history. A reflection of her fierce intensity of spirit, this simultaneously reveals a streak of absolutism which, by all accounts, functions naively in her personal dealings. She nurses ethical standards of an unworldly exaltedness, breaks off relationships at the merest hint of bad faith, and is in general as elusive and unbending as her music suggests. While not conventionally introverted, hers is the work of an artist travelling relentlessly into the heart of a private vision, with no distracted (or forgiving) glances in any other direction - a sort of musical edition of Simone Weil.


It is not difficult to imagine the disgust someone of Ustvolskaya's temperament must have felt at having to filthy her hands with concessions to the Soviet Communist Party. Referring to her slab-like sonorities delivered with piledriving staccato attack, Dutch critic Elmer Schoenberger has called her "the lady with the hammer". Perhaps more accurate would be "the lady with the flail". The puritanical lashing fury of her music often suggests the image of Christ flogging the moneylenders from the temple, while several writers have remarked on the "Old Testament" vengefulness they hear in her work. There is a pounding masculinity in many of Ustvolskaya's scores - few men, let alone women, have written music as violent as this - which bespeaks an affinity more for Jehovah than for Jesus, for the railing prophets of the Exile rather than the Gospel message of love. (Not entirely coincidentally, she dislikes having her music performed by women.)

Critics have strained for parallels between Ustvolskaya's music and that of her nominal teacher Shostakovich - but, aside from a predilection for bleakly oscillating semitones and brief, rhythmically emphatic mottos, few similarities have been found. One close resemblance does, however, exist. If Ustvolskaya's experience of spiritual repression under Communism cultivated an inner kinship with the moral anger of the Old Testament, then Shostakovich, particularly in his later music, expresses something very similar - and in similar language. In The New Shostakovich (1990), the present writer noted a motto link between Shostakovich's music for the 1964 film of Hamlet and his cantata The Execution of Stepan Razin, written in the same year:

"These scores share a militant simplicity, almost puritanical in its distrust of anything colourful or soft-edged. Inherited from the Thirteenth Symphony is an edge of irascible Old Testament violence, crashing down in vengeful blows from an enlarged percussion section. Both Stepan Razin and Hamlet feature these flagellating chords, cracked out with the help of the whip and woodblock introduced in the Thirteenth's third movement.

"That Shostakovich had a need for sackcloth and ashes after the Twelfth Symphony is possible - but it squares neither with his usually forceful creativity nor his, by now, extreme toughness of mind. More probable is that after the failure of the third thaw (and more particularly, the banning of one of his most personal and outspoken works) he was simply furious with the Soviet mediocracy and the morally rotten art it brandished as exemplary. Solzhenitsyn's description of the Writers' Union as 'a rabble of hucksters and moneychangers' voices the same vituperative disgust as Shostakovich's Hamlet and Stepan Razin.

"It is as if the composer has seen too much evil, suffered too much duplicity. Like Britten, he ponders in old age a kind of Noh theatre of moral parable, chiselling away the superfluous to expose the essential human beneath, bereft of its camouflage of vanity and pretence. The further into the late period this theme is pursued, the more extreme it becomes. Lashing 'infamy and crime', 'those who jabber lies', and 'the malevolent crowd' in his Suite on Verses of Michelangelo, Shostakovich prowls the verge of misanthropy like some latterday Ecclesiastes, the whipcrack chords of Hamlet and Stepan Razin raining down in the eighth movement as though the scars of calumny were as livid to him in 1974 as they had been in 1936, 1948, and 1962."

The parallels between Shostakovich and Ustvolskaya in the former's Suite on Verses of Michelangelo are specially interesting in that this work also contains, in its ninth movement, a folk-like theme from the finale of one of Ustvolskaya's early pieces: the Clarinet Trio of 1949. (Conceivably Shostakovich's Stepan Razin of 1964 may likewise be connected in some way with Ustvolskaya's Stepan Razin of 1948.) What, though, apart from a shared mood and method, does this link indicate?


 

Ustvolskaya and Shostakovich

Ustvolskaya was a pupil of Shostakovich in Leningrad between 1937 and 1947, and they maintained a close, and closely guarded, relationship. That she represented something special to him, both artistically and personally, is beyond doubt. Equally clear is that this closeness was eventually explosive. In an interview with Ustvolskaya conducted by Dutch journalist Thea Derks (Tempo 193, July 1995) it emerges that Shostakovich proposed to her "during the Fifties", that she refused him, and that their relationship appears to have ended acrimoniously soon afterwards. In a recent letter to her German publisher, Ustvolskaya writes dismissively of Shostakovich:
"Then, as now, I determinedly rejected his music, and unfortunately his personality only intensified this negative attitude... One thing remains as clear as day: a seemingly eminent figure such as Shostakovich, to me, is not eminent at all, on the contrary he burdened my life and killed my best feelings."

The true story of this affair may never be known. Ustvolskaya refuses to say more. Yet, during the Forties, their involvement seems to have been intense. Mstislav Rostropovich knew both of them around 1948 and records of Ustvolskaya that "she certainly regarded Shostakovich very highly, and indeed there was a very 'tender' relationship between them." Rostropovich further notes that Ustvolskaya was one of the close friends who gave Shostakovich emotional support during the aftermath of the Zhdanov Decree. Elizabeth Wilson (whose book Shostakovich: A Life Remembered is the source of Rostropovich's observations) reveals that Shostakovich's marriage to Nina Varzar was, by mutual agreement, "open" and that his liaison with Ustvolskaya was an "open secret".

For his part, Shostakovich was obviously deeply struck by Ustvolskaya, calling her his "musical conscience" and submitting his scores for her approval. He supposedly defended her music against official attack, declaring: "I am convinced that the music of G. I. Ustvolskaya will achieve world fame, and be valued by all who hold truth to be the essential element of music." In a letter to her he acknowledged that she had influenced him - adding, perhaps cryptically, that he'd failed to influence her.

How, when, and for what duration their relationship exceeded that of teacher and pupil is, for now, unknown. The early Fifties were, by all accounts, a desperately isolated period in Shostakovich's life and his need for close companionship, evidently unsatisfied by his marriage, may then have caused him to lean too heavily on Ustvolskaya with disastrous results. (It may be significant that the same quotation from her Clarinet Trio which appears in Shostakovich's Suite on Verses by Michelangelo first turns up in his work at a pivotal point in his stressful Fifth Quartet of 1952.)

A similarly intense, though chiefly epistolatory, relationship developed between Shostakovich and another of his students, Elmira Nazhirova between 1953 and 1956. (This, too, led to a musical reference in one of his key works: the horn call in the third movement of the Tenth Symphony.) Possibly the Nazhirova affair began after the break with Ustvolskaya, the former filling the absence left by the latter. There again, Marina Sabinina records that Ustvolskaya was still part of Shostakovich's intimate entourage in late October 1955 (at the Moscow première of his First Violin Concerto). This suggests that the break with Ustvolskaya happened near to, if not consequent upon, Shostakovich's sudden unexpected marriage to Margarita Kainova in July 1956. In this case, Ustvolskaya, rather than Shostakovich, may have been the rejected party.

Whatever the truth, Ustvolskaya's subsequent bitter repudiation of a man she had been close to for nearly twenty years indicates that the break-up was painful and final - so much so that the absolutist streak which drove to her to purge her opus list of all "compromised" material may likewise have prompted a retrospective revision of her relationship with Shostakovich. In his foreword to Ustvolskaya's Sikorski catalogue of 1990, her friend and protector the composer Viktor Suslin (b. 1942) insists that "on several occasions Shostakovich supported her in the Union of Soviet Composers against opposition from his colleagues". Yet, five years later, talking to Thea Derks, he relays a different version of the past - one clearly emanating from Ustvolskaya herself:

"Madame Ustvolskaya is always represented as a pupil of Shostakovich, and time and again she is forced to read that he defended her music when she graduated from the conservatory. This information stems from one single letter Shostakovich wrote to Edison Denisov. At the time, however, Galina was astounded and deeply disappointed by his conspicuous silence. It was not Shostakovich, but Mikhail Gnessin, who defended her."

If Ustvolskaya was so deeply disillusioned by Shostakovich at the time of her graduation in 1947, why did she remain in such close proximity to him for a further eight years? Has the absolutism intrinsic to her music - one hesitates, if only out of politeness, to call it "fanaticism" - led to a wholesale rewriting of her personal history? This would not be at odds with the personality conveyed in Derks' account of her bizarre "interview" with Ustvolskaya (conducted through Viktor Suslin, despite the fact that journalist and composer were alike fluent in both Russian and German). The abrupt, anxious, explosively eccentric old woman Ustvolskaya has become may bear only a partial resemblance to the 37-year-old who broke with Shostakovich in 1956.


Shostakovich dedicated no works to Ustvolskaya and there is no mention of her in Testimony. Several quite different conclusions might be drawn from this and there is too little evidence at present to choose between them. All we can be sure of is that the quotation from Ustvolskaya's Clarinet Trio in the ninth movement of Shostakovich's Suite on Verses of Michelangelo shows that he did not blot her completely out of his mind after she rejected him. Louis Blois's thoughtful observations on the textual context of this latter quotation (Tempo 182, September 1992) - in particular his hint that the music, as well as the poem, may be taken as "an elegy of unrequited love" - suggest that, so far as Shostakovich was concerned, the fire had not quite gone out twenty years later. If this is so, the dual motifs of ascetic incorruptibility and eroticism in the Michelangelo cycle perhaps ultimately converge on thoughts of Ustvolskaya; indeed, she may also be present in the stark Symbolist shadows of Shostakovich's austere Seven Romances on Poems of Alexander Blok.

The Shostakovich-Ustvolskaya connection is full of interest for Shostakovich fans. Was his Piano Quintet (whose Bachian prelude is described by the present writer in The New Shostakovich as "the jeremiad of a modern yurodivy, foretelling weeping and gnashing of teeth") an early by-product of their relationship? Did she introduce him to the Psalms, which he claims in Testimony constitute a sub-text to his Seventh Symphony? - Or was all of this independently suggested by his studies of Bach's Preludes and Fugues and Stravinsky's Symphony of Psalms during the late Thirties?

Yet, for all this, Ustvolskaya's music bears only a distant relationship to Shostakovich's. Her often radically skeletal polyphony has been plausibly cited as influential on Shostakovich's late style. More obviously, the two composers share a penchant for the semitone and an abiding reliance on the passacaglia form - though here the influence, if there was any, must surely have been from Shostakovich to Ustvolskaya. (The second "theme" of the first movement of her Clarinet Trio recalls - albeit only in the most basic rhythmic-harmonic sense - the passacaglia in the second movement of Shostakovich's First Quartet of 1938.) Apart from that, similarities between the two composers are thin on the ground; indeed precedents for Ustvolskaya's style in general are difficult to discern.


 

An art without influence?

Parallels have been drawn between Ustvolskaya and figures as diverse as Hindemith, Bartok, Pettersson, Pärt, and the Minimalists. The Stravinsky of Les Noces and Symphony of Psalms is certainly audible in her Octet (1949-50). A commonality with Panufnik's simplicity and blocklike sectionality and the percussive attack of Gorecki's Lerchenmusik is likewise clear, if coincidental. More curiously, in her First and (particularly) her Second Piano Sonata, there seems to be a background influence from the hieratic music of Satie, especially that of his Rosicrucian phase. (The two styles share a lofty symbolic ambience, static tonality, steady crotchet pace, and inclination towards passacaglia/variation form, although these similarities are disguised by Ustvolskaya's violence of attack.)

Aside from a Scelsi-like absorption in single notes and overtone harmonics, however, Ustvolskaya is nearest in style and concept to middle-period Messiaen. This is suggested by similarities between her Fifth Prelude and "Par lui tout a été fait" from Vingt regards sur l'enfant Jésus, and (partly through the instrumentation) between her Clarinet Trio and the Quatuor pour le fin du temps. It is also apparent in the first and last movements of her Fifth Piano Sonata and virtually explicit in the Duet for violin and piano (1964), which, in parts, bears a resemblance to Cantéjodaya. Her mood, though, is dark and apocalyptic compared to the Frenchman's dazzling acid colours, and always deeply obsessional. (Whether Ustvolskaya knew Messiaen's music is presently unknown. As the work of a Catholic modernist, his scores were excoriated as degenerate by Khrennikov at the 1948 Composers' Union Congress, and are unlikely to have circulated in Soviet conservatories during the Fifties.)


Much of how we eventually come to pigeonhole Ustvolskaya will depend on what we think her music is saying. Doubtless there are clues to be found in musicological details, but since the composer severely discourages us from examining her methods too closely ("I implore all those who really love my music to refrain from theoretical analysis of it"), it seems appropriate to judge it from a respectful distance by trying to understand it as a whole. This, though, is no easy task. While Ustvolskaya herself is convinced that her meaning will be transparent to anyone who approaches her work in the right spirit, very little music is as enigmatically personal as hers, and it is often difficult to decide what this right spirit might be. For example, in attempting to summarise Ustvolskaya's art, Frans C. Lemaire (Music in 20th Century Russia, Fayard, 1994) waxes cosmological, likening it to a distant star on which gravity has collapsed the universe into the density of an orange:

"This state of density prior to the birth of the universe without doubt corresponds to a spiritual condition... one before all religion, before the Cross... In this cosmic, non-terrestrial dimension, nature has no place... Man himself, that incorrigible romantic, has no role here."

This might make more sense had Ustvolskaya not composed symphonies imploring the mercy of Christ and addressing God in conventional Christian terms via The Lord's Prayer. Hers is certainly not impersonal music of the sort Lemaire suggests; if anything, the opposite. Such is its stylisation, however, that it can easily be mistaken for something inhumanly supramundane. For example, the cover of Reinbert de Leeuw's disc for hatART features an abstract by Konstantin Malevich, a link underlined in the sleeve note by Art Lange, who claims that "Ustvolskaya is writing Suprematist music". Yet if by this, Lange means that Ustvolskaya's music is purely abstract, there are several reasons to doubt it. Much of the otherwise stark and uningratiating Violin Sonata (1952) sounds like "music-speech", its repetitive motto units suggesting verbal phrases (indeed, at times, words of endearment). Again, in the Octet, there is a strong sense of emotional-pictorial images abstracted to the limit of "representation" - but not beyond it. Unlike Malevich's Red Square, in which his "peasant woman" has completely disappeared into planar abstraction, Ustvolskaya's "peasants" in her Octet (if such they are) remain vestigially identifiable. If there is a parallel to her music in the 20th century Russian visual arts, it would seem more accurate to nominate the abstract expressionism of Vasily Kandinsky.

The composer herself is of little help in elucidating this. We have it on her assurance that her art is spiritual without possessing specifically religious associations - yet, in her work of the last quarter century, she has regularly used Catholic liturgical titles and concepts, and insists that the best place to perform and hear it is in church. That her concept of God is both vividly apprehended and thoroughly idiosyncratic is clear from the absence of tenderness and redemption in her music, which seems predominantly apocalyptic in tone and outlook. The texts she sets in her Second, Third, and Fourth symphonies are by Hermannus Contractus, a German monk of the 11th century who was almost completely paralysed and could hardly speak.Pre sumably the extremity of Hermannus' predicament appeals to a corresponding extremity - perhaps even a martyr-complex - in Ustvolskaya. (This suggests a parallel with Lili Boulanger's setting of the work of a comparably disabled woman poet in her final song Dans l'immense Tristesse.) Whatever the ultimate nature of Ustvolskaya's vision, there is no avoiding the fact that the absolutism of its hair-shirt integrity is unlikely to endear it to more than a small audience of devotees.

Viktor Suslin has spoken of Ustvolskaya's Third Symphony as "a form of exorcism". This description might easily be applied to almost everything in her opus-list, the consistency of whose style is rigid from the start. Suslin has further offered that Ustvolskaya's work is at once spiritual and temporal, and that its temporal face has been definitively conditioned by her life in Soviet society:

"Music such as hers could only develop in that place, at that time. In this century, St Petersburg witnessed numerous horrors, of which the siege in the Second World War is only one."
If the fate of Galina Ustvolskaya is, finally, to be seen as a late 20th century echo of Heinrich Schütz in his capacity as the musical voice of catastrophe-wracked 17th century Protestant Europe, that will be an honourable, if intrinsically unpopular, role. Humour - indeed any form of relieving contrast - is scarcely to be found in her work, and, though doubtless ruthlessly true both to its times and its composer's inner voice, it remains difficult to penetrate and, for much of its extent, difficult to listen to, let alone to love.

A brief survey

Ustvolskaya's official catalogue runs to twenty-one works and includes five symphonies, six piano sonatas, and a number of works for chamber groupings. What is crucial to grasp is that she regards all her music, for whatever instruments, as implicitly orchestral in scale.

Calling an eight-minute, one movement piece for four performers a "symphony" (her Fourth) may seem like the gesture of a provocateuse, but the composer is serious and her description plays a functional role in defining the music's cosmic scope. Very probably her preference for small groups stems from an early recognition that private performances by friends would be the only way she would get to hear her scores during her lifetime. Yet, as she forcefully insists, her pieces, whether for soloist or anything up to ten players, are never "merely" chamber music. (When her Grand Duet was programmed at the 65th Festival of the International Society for Contemporary Music in Switzerland in 1991, she made the organisers change the classification of the recital from Chamber Music to Concert.) Imaginatively, Ustvolskaya's music is built on a cosmic scale with a ritualistic dimension she prefers realised in a church setting. While often only a few musicians may be at work in her pieces, it is up to us to hear the orchestra and choir within her striving sonorities and frantic dynamics. (Her Fifth Piano Sonata contains the marking ffffff.)

So far, half a dozen discs have featured works by Ustvolskaya, providing an incomplete view of her art. In the last year, however, the Belgium company Megadisc has begun to issue a complete edition in six volumes, recorded in St Petersburg by Oleg Malov and the St Petersburg Soloists. The first four volumes of this series are already available; the remaining two, devoted to the symphonies, will be issued around the beginning of 1996.

Malov, Professor of Piano at the St Petersburg Conservatory, has been associated with Ustvolskaya's music for the last twenty years. He has given most of her premières and her Third Piano Sonata is dedicated to him. Though less well recorded than, say, the discs by Reinbert de Leeuw's group, Malov and his St Petersburg Soloists are by and large far more purposeful and energetic than their recorded Western rivals. (The London Musici's version of the Octet, for example, is lifeless by comparison.) This, of course, stems from the Russians' proximity to the composer, whose sometimes obscure wishes - no bar-lines, only maximum permissible speeds given - have evidently been communicated to them with an inspiring forcefulness. No one seriously interested in Ustvolskaya can be without the Megadisc series as a whole, which must inevitably serve as a template and standard by which all other recordings will be judged. That said, Ustvolskaya has recently withdrawn her support for Malov and transferred it to de Leeuw - although this appears to be solely the consequence of Malov's desire to play the music of other composers as well as hers.

For Shostakovich devotees, the main work of interest will, of course, be the Clarinet Trio, which may well come to be regarded as Ustvolskaya's best work. Of the three versions available in her current discography, the Barton Workshop's on Etcetera is ruled out by an excessively precipitate reading of the opening Espressivo, reducing a fifteen-minute work to eleven minutes. Reinbert de Leeuw, on the other hand, stretches this movement out too far. Exactly bifurcating the time-differences between Barton and de Leeuw, Malov's group brings in the most convincing performance, albeit that his clarinet player is closely recorded to the point of occasional distortion. Honours are even in the quiet, motionless Dolce, but the Russians win again in the closing Energico, projecting the main theme (reminiscent of the climactic second section of the Second Piano Sonata) in a deliberate, pesante manner which allows the secondary "folk" tune (the one quoted by Shostakovich) to sound naturally, rather than being hastily garbled, as in the rival versions. In the St Petersburg recording, the effect is of an upsurge of rebellious popular feeling, such as is suggested by the variation finale of Shostakovich's Second Quartet.

If the Megadisc issues are generally first choices in this repertoire, it should be borne in mind that some of the Western discs are more varied in content and sometimes constitute valid alternative views. (De Leeuw's recitals are foremost in this category.) Furthermore, the Megadisc series suffers from sparse banding - which makes it impossible to sample individual movements - and, on the piano sonata disc, inadequate gaps between works. On the other hand, Megadisc do very well with their sleeve designs and full liner notes.

SUPER MARIO BROTHERS THEME - CLARINET QUARTET - VIDEO http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZmkWv5ApvM

HOW TO BEGIN TO PLAY THE CLARINET - VIDEO http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KRcl0skINVU&NR=1

HOW TO PLAY THE 5 MAJOR NOTES ON THE CLARINET http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84u2GtR2zVo&NR=1

PINK PANTHER VIDEO - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ah4u4m4L7Is&NR=1

 

 

I then two two separate photos of a drum and bugle corps playing against each other, and the word 'fight' was spoken each time.

Just when I was coming out of it, I saw a father and son together in a livingroom.  The father said to the son, "I want to show you something," and the little boy giggled with delight - and then I heard the words  'death-house.'

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11-14-09 - NAP DREAM - I was in the New Berlin house and suddenly there was a huge flood outside - so huge that no one could leave or come to the house from 3 directions - east, south, and west.  A high hill was to the north.

All of a sudden my friend Diane arrived who lives east of the house.  I asked her got to my house - by boat?  She laughed, and asked, "have you looked outside?"  I hadn't and woke up before I could.  I assumed the water went down again.

11-14-09 - NAP DREAM 2 - I was making some kind of brown woven thing in a wooden frame, but there were gold bars showing in the 4 corners, they each said something different, but the 2 on the bottom end said  DEATH and DESTRUCTION.

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11-15-09 - DREAM - I was living in my New Berlin, WI house. My Mother came to visit and we were in the livingroom chatting.  I then went into the diningroom to check on my bird cage and I saw that there were no birds in it.  I got really frightened that they were lost, but when I looked out the window I saw that the tree near the house was full of beautiful birds of every imaginable color, parrots, canaries, parakeets, finches, all kinds of birds, and every color.  All I had to do was feed them and give them water, and they would be happy and safe from harm.

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11-15-09 - VISION - As I was waking up I saw 3 wooden spoons.

I know what that means - I have to cook today, prunes, eggs, and yams.  Not together - in separate pots. I'm out of everything to eat again.

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11-16-09 - DREAM - I was on a bus and met a woman who had come from London to work with me.  She was blonde and blue eyed. To me she looked to be around 25 to 30 years old, so she wasn't a teen.

When she got to my place, we were in the basement.  There was a handsome young man there and he made a play for her and she blew him off, which made me think she might be a Lesbian, but it might be that she was focused on the work and not on her personal life.

We sat down on chairs and I started seeing black widow spiders and large black beetles running around, so I had to stop the conversations, grabbed a can of bug spray and started killing the spiders and bugs from a distance with the can of spray.  There were a lot of them.

Once I got all the bugs and spiders killed, the woman and I started to talk to each other again and she showed me that she had three golden scarab beetles on her chest.,

 NOTE:  Carl Jung’s investigation of synchronicity was triggered by a patient’s dream, in which she was given a golden scarab. Jung knew the scarab is a symbol of rebirth in Egyptian mythology and believed the dream might portend some sort of psychological rebirth that would pull her out of the excessive rationalism that had impeded her treatment. As he was about to say as much, he heard a noise behind him and glanced around to see an insect fluttering at the glass. He opened the window to let the bug in, caught it, and discovered it was the closest thing his area had to a scarab beetle.

The light reflected from the metallic-shiny regions of the cuticle of certain beetles belonging to the Scarabaeoidea is known since 1911 to be left-handed circularly polarized. Only photographs of a few selected species of scarabs, taken through left- and right-circular polarizers, have earlier been published. Through a right-circular polarizer these beetles appear more or less dark. This demonstration is, however, inadequate to quantitatively investigate the spatial distribution and the wavelength dependency of the circular polarization of light reflected from the scarab cuticle. In order to overcome this problem, we have developed a portable, rotating analyzer, linear/circular, digital, and imaging polarimeter. We describe here our polarimetric technique and present for the first time the linear and circular polarization patterns of the scarab species Chrysophora chrysochlora, Plusiotis resplendens (Rutelidae), and Cetonischema jousselini (Cetoniidae) in the red (650 nm), green (550 nm), and blue (450 nm) parts of the spectrum. We found the wavelength- and species-dependent circular polarization patterns in scarabs to be of a rather complex nature. These patterns are worthy of further studies.

.The third reference I found about the golden scarab beetle is a re-enterpretation of the Egyptian Pyramid Texts

http://www.eclipse-chasers.com/egygod3.htm

WHO WAS KHEPRI?

The scarab beetle was the manifestation of the creator god Khepri. Its name means 'he who comes to being' (1). Khepri was deified from as early as the Old Kingdom (2700-2190 BC), and played a primary role in the Heliopolitan cosmogony of the Pyramid Texts (2). As a solar deity, Khepri was associated with Atum and Re, the primal Sun gods (3). Plutarch, the ancient Greek writer who lived in the Roman period, gave a plausible interpretation of the origin and role of Khepri:

As for the scarab beetle, it is held that there are no females of this species; they are all males. They place their seed in a round pellet of material which they roll up into a sphere and roll along, pushing it with their legs, imitating by their action the course of the Sun from east to west.

(Source: B. Watterson, The Gods of Ancient Egypt, p. 51, Sutton Publishing, 1996.)

Thus, in most text books on Egyptology we find that the role of Khepri was to push the Sun disc in its diurnal circle, and the emergence of larva inspired its action of spontaneous creation. However, I disagree with Plutarch! My objections are:
 


The solar eclipse is a more powerful phenomenon, it must have greatly influenced the Egyptian solar theology.

I rather, believe, the belief in Khepri was inspired by the dark New Moon, seen during the totality phase of a total solar eclipse.

*******************

11-17-09 - DREAM -  Joe and I were like little children and we were cleaning the bathroom.  We had three dogs.  I asked Joe to build a gate for Lily to keep her out of my bathroom.  When I went outside, I discovered a third dog which was like a grey puff ball type fur.  He had light brown ends all over the top of him.  I don't know what caused that to happen.  It didn't look natural.

As I woke up, I heard the names  Genusite and Genuseb.  I didn't find either one on the internet, but I found Jebusite.  Wondering if thats what it was, but I can't be sure.  Even the Bible isn't sure about the name.

***********************

11-18-09 - DREAM -  I found out that there were two comets incoming.  One of them was named "Watermark".  The other one hadn't been named yet.  A new law was passed that forced people to pay the government more money because of these comets, so I sat down and wrote a check for each one and sent them in.

For some reason, I had a fight with my boyfriend after that, which was more of a wrestling match. He came back later and wanted to see my bruises, which I didn't know I had.  When his young son saw my bruises, he stood there and laughed at me.  That made me look in a mirror to see how bad the bruises were and I had a red mark on my neck and my whole chest was bright yellow. 

I then went home to change clothes to cover up my neck and chest so nobody could see the bruising and there were business people in my apartment making decisions about something, and one of the men was a tall black man who I knew lived next door to me.  I wondered why they were using my apartment for their meeting instead of his.  All the doors were open down the hallway at the time I noticed.

I went into the closet to put on a blouse that covered up my neck and chest so nobody could see the bruises, then went outside to look at the sky to watch for the comets.  The sky was a darker shade of blue but not yet dark but the sun had gone down.  I walked around outside wrapped in a white sheet like a shroud. I didn't see anyone else out there watching the sky, though there were people coming and going.  It was like I was the only one who knew the comets were coming, but I realized I looked like a religious zealot walking around wearing the sheet.

  1. Amazon.com: Watermark: The Disaster That Changed the World and ...

    Watermark: The Disaster That Changed the World and Humanity 12000 Years Ago, +, The Cycle of Cosmic Catastrophes: How a Stone-Age Comet Changed the Course ...
    www.amazon.com/Watermark-Disaster-Changed.../0743491904

*********************

11-19-09 - DREAM -  I was in a house, packing to move.  At the same time, I was preparing to bake three kinds of meat, which were screwed to a board in the oven.  I was also cleaning out the freezer and draining excess water in the sink which was porcelain.  There were three things I didn't have - my keys, my red purse, and some 'orange' ice.  I couldn't go outside to the car where my things were because Joe's son Mike was blocking the doorway.  I could see past him how bright the sunshine was outside, but he was standing in the way.

My ex-husband brought me the three things I needed, my keys, my red purse and the orange ice, and then I was happy, and started building a radio from scratch on a large wooden table.  The only thing that bothered me was there was a black guy standing off to the side watching me from the corner of his eye, and I had to impress him how hard I was working.

***************************

11-20-09  - DREAM - I was living in a one story house.  It was nighttime and I went around the house locking the doors.  I had one left to do and all of a sudden people were coming into the house - first came Grandma as I called her - it was Ed's Mom.  Right after her came my 1st husband's kids - Bob was a teenager, and I saw him bend over the kiss the head of  what looked like Teah from One Life to Live.  I pulled him off of her and shoved him into bed, and then I went to check on Grandma and there were four other family members with her in bed. Everyone was already sleeping.   I had been sewing and I saw the word BUTTON and the two TTs looked like BBs with the TT's inside them.  Everything was pastel colored like quilting patterns.

******************************

11-20-09 - VISION -  I was just laying down to go to sleep, when I saw a man go prostrate on the floor - arms outstretch wide like a T shape - facing east.  A voice said, "Why don't you go further out?"

**********************

11-20-09 - DREAM - I was in a city like the south side of Milwaukee.  I had parked out front of a house I lived in.  A female friend came over and I wanted her to park there, but in order to do that, I had to move my car to the back.  I didn't have my car keys with me so I had to climb up the front up the front of the house like it was a ladder.  A girl next door was doing the same thing and she fell off her house and fell over on top on me.  She  said the ambulance would take both of us.

I went into the back yard to look at where I had to park so I would know what the spot looked like, and would recognize it. Across the alley from my yard was a beautiful double doored screen door.  So I knew I could recognize my parking spot from that.

Next door. there were two older men like a man and his father.  They looked like old soldiers to me and I told them that I was going to park back there, so they wouldn't worry when they saw my blue car pull up into my yard.

As I started to wake up, I saw the date May 1954.

OLD SOLDIERS - MAY, 1954  http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&q=May+1954+soldiers&start=20&sa=N

THE FALL OF DIEN BIEN PHU  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Dien_Bien_Phu

  1. Battle of Dien Bien Phu - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    DIEN =  FINE    BIEN =  FARM/FARMING  - PHU  =  MOUNTAIN

    So,  Dien Bien Phi, means  Fine farm of the Mountain.

    The battle occurred between March and May 1954 and culminated in a comprehensive French ..... The French disposition at Dien Bien Phu, as of March 1954. ...
    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Dien_Bien_Phu - Cached
     
    Dien Bien Phu - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
    ... on May 7, 1954. ...
    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dien_Bien_Phu
    Geneva Conference (1954) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
    The Geneva Conference (May 8 – July 21, 1954) was a conference between many ...
    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geneva_Conference_(1954)
    More results from en.wikipedia.org »
  2. WikiAnswers - What happened at Dien Bein Phu on May 7 1954

    Vietnam War question: What happened at Dien Bein Phu on May 7 1954? The French were defeated by the Viet Minh in conventional battle; the French surrendered ...
    wiki.answers.com/.../What_happened_at_Dien_Bein_Phu_on_May_7_1954 - Cached - Similar
  3. Wapedia - Wiki: Battle of Dien Bien Phu

    Wiki: Battle of Dien Bien Phu. The Battle of Dien Bien Phu (French: Bataille de Diên ... The battle occurred between March and May 1954 and culminated in a ...
    wapedia.mobi/en/Battle_of_Dien_Bien_Phu - Cached
  4. What happened on May 7,1954 at a place called Dien Bien Phu ...

    6 Jul 2007 ... Source(s): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dien_Bien_P… 2 years ago ... Dien Bien Phu fell on May 7, 1954, and the defeated French left ...
    answers.yahoo.com › Arts & Humanities History - Cached
  5. Dien Bien Phu: Definition from Answers.com

    The French military base here fell to Vietminh troops on May 7, 1954, after a. ... It uses material from the Wikipedia article "Dien Bien Phu". Read more ...
    www.answers.com/topic/dien-bien-phu - Cached - Similar
  6. Viet Minh Defeat French at Dien Bien Phu - Timelines.com

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Dien_Bie... Negotiations leading to the 1954 Geneva accords began on May 8, the day after the surrender of the ...
    timelines.com/1954/5/7/viet-minh-defeat-french-at-dien-bien-phu - Cached
  7. File:Dien bien phu castor or siege deinterlaced.png - Wikimedia ...

    11 Aug 2009 ... May 1954(1954-05) ... The following other wikis use this file: Usage of Dien bien phu castor or siege deinterlaced.png on arwiki ...
    commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Dien_bien_phu_castor_or_siege_deinterlaced.png - Cached - Similar
  8. Dien Bien Phu - definition of Dien Bien Phu by the Free Online ...

    Dien Bien Phu (dy n by n f ). A town of northwest Vietnam near the Laos border. The French military base here fell to Vietminh troops on May 7, 1954, ...
    www.thefreedictionary.com/Dien+Bien+Phu - Cached - Similar
  9. INEX: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (Battle of Dien Bien Phu)

    The Battle of Dien Bien Phu (Chiến dịch Điện Biên Phủ) was the final battle in ... It occurred between March and May, 1954, and ended in a massive French ...
    infao5501.ag5.mpi-sb.mpg.de:8080/topx/archive?...Wikipedia... - Cached
  10. Treaty of Hue (1883/1884), Battle of Dien Bien Phu (1954) - Asia ...

    4 posts - 3 authors - Last post: 22 Apr
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Dien_Bien_Phu ... The battle occurred between March and May 1954 and culminated in a comprehensive ...
    www.asiafinest.com › ... › Asian Culture Vietnamese Chat - Cached
see:  http://www.greatdreams.com/war/dien_bien_phu.htm

********************

11-21-09 - DREAM - I was living in a house somewhere.  There were a lot of people in the house, chit-chatting with each other. All the children were in one room playing together.

I was doing the laundry, sorting it out by color, starting with the all white, then with colored with white lace on it, followed by the colors. I noticed that when the clothing was washed in the washer, the water then drained into the bathtub and went down that drain.

Between wash loads, I sat on a chair so I could observe what everyone else was doing.

IESOUS came up next to me on my left side, and asked me if I knew what the children were doing. I told him that the children were playing with the laundry, which was okay  with me once it was clean. He said, "Okay!"

IESOUS and all the other men then went to the basement to do what men do -  play cards, run little trains on little train tracks - talk man talk, etc.

And I sat there watching the laundry get done and enjoying listening to the children play.

*************************

11-21-09 - VISION -  The scene was a livingroom with a couch in the center facing me.  Behind the couch was a bunch of guys.  Two of the men forcibly grabbed on of the men and threw him over the back of the couch unto the seat of the couch.  The man had a thick red X  that was wider than it was high right over his heart.  I heard someone say, "Does the red X look better on his heart, or on this guys?"  indicating someone else.  Then I saw a two-toned large monkey (whitish face - dark body)  being flipped upsidedown and rightsideup over the back of the couch onto the seat of the couch.

That's all that was said.

********************************

11-22-09 - DREAM - I was helping a group of people to prepare an old building that had been used before to house a lot of new people.  To me, it seemed like they would be warriors or soldiers - but not in modern time uniforms - more like Star Trek uniforms - like astronauts or something.

I hadn't yet been inside the building. I was going around the outside to see the conditions. I came across a large wooden barrel in the middle of the yard that was supposed to have flowers planted in it.  I looked in the barrel, and apparently an animal had been in it similar to my cat BeBop who will dig in any container with dirt in it to use it for a potty box.  There was a large hole in the loose dirt and the dirt had been flung up and over the bulbs and blooming flowers.  I used my hand to uncover the flowers and rebury the bulbs.  The dirt was dry and loose - not really black - it was medium brown colored.

I went towards the building, which was made of old red brick, and the entrance went down into the basement where there was a bar and tables to sit around.  I was told the cover charge was $18 per person.  I didn't think that was too unreasonable a price.

When I entered the bar -  a beautiful woman walked into the room, hand in hand with a brown creature who was wider than she was - rather like teddy bear fur, standing on its hind legs, but its face (or mask) was made of silver - absolutely flat sculptured with features of a bull.  She said to me, "Are you ready for sleep- sleep?"

This face is similar, but in the dream the rest of the animal was brown and furry.

****************************

11-22-09 - NAP DREAM - HOW TO CAPTURE A UFO

I was at home, working on a project for my daughter who was about 10 years old.  This project was for school.  I was hooking some plastic strips together with silver hooks.  The strips were about 3 inches by 3 inches and were sky blue in color, and the hooks were about an inch long and hooked one piece of plastic to the next.  I had a whole lot of them hooked together.  The idea was to hook one end of the length of strips to a bicycle, and the other end to another bicycle.

I had just finished the project when my daughter arrived at home with her teacher - a male - with a very plain oval face and no eyebrows and I swear - no eyelids either.  When they arrived - they brought other children with them to work on the project outside the house near the street.  When they arrived, I tried to give the hooked lengths of strips to the teacher - because it was his project, however, he said, "No!"  I'm going to put 'you' to work, and he told me to take the length of strips outside and hook them onto my daughter's bicycle.

He then stood in front of me giving instructions to the students who were also working on this project - wearing a hat on his head similar to what the Pope wears, and now his face, with the open eyes and no eyebrows was really strange.

We then got into a car and started driving down a wide road with a median strip to our left and we were in the left-most lane.  A medium blue car was ahead of us and was making a left turn, through the median over to a mall which was also on the left.  We were going to go straight and just as the car ahead of started to make his left turn, a car shot straight across the street, through the median way over to another street on the right.  He went so fast, it was hard to not only keep track of him, but I wondered how nobody hit him and he shot straight across all the traffic. 

Reminds me of this NASA video.

 

***************************

11-23-09 - DREAM -  (This dream took several hours - i was working for the government in the 'supply' department.

In the beginning, I was working with carpet samples - mostly different shades of green.  The samples were 2 feet x 3 feet and if you had enough of the samples like we did, you could lay them side by side and make a carpet just of the samples.  As it happened, Joe's cousin Donny came and wanted to know if he could have some samples, and when I said, "Yes1"  he took everything we had in the storeroom.  I was shocked that he would take everything there was, but I could get more easily, so I didn't say anything to anyone, because I had said, "Yes!"

Later on, I was looking outside, and saw one of those Harrier type planes that works like a helicopter but flies like a plane too, and this plane was carrying a load of some kind of yellow powder, and it dumped it down into a tall silo.  This yellow powder was used for women, but I don't know why -  it just worried me a lot that the government was giving out this yellow powder just to women.

I was helping with cleanup in one of the areas that had a slanted floor - like a chute type slant.  I noticed that it had a lot of tiny little bugs that moved really fast and I couldn't sweep them down fast enough to get rid of them.

********************************

11-23-09 - HYPNOSIS WITH BRIAN WEISS - The first time you do something like this, you are bit nervous because you don't know how they work.   This was very relaxing. 

While he was talking, I saw the name Jade911 and then the words Pg. 1 of 2.  Then I started hearing his voice telling me to go to a different time and space and he broke that up.

The dog outside was whining and that kept pulling me out. 

After it was over, I fell into a dream.

I was outside of a house and it was like yard sale.  There was a line of people looking at something on display on the left - maybe a cage of puppies or something.

A man stopped by with his daughter and his son who were about 10 and 8 years old.  I asked the man if his daughter might have to go to the bathroom, and he answered that it might not be a bad idea.

So I took the girl into the back hall, and the man brought his son along behind me as I was leading the girl up the stairs.

I told him that I didn't think it was a good idea to bring the boy into the house with the girl and I and he refused to let me take her into the house, and changed his mind. 

So, we went back outside.  I noted that when he interrupted me, I was confused as to whether the stairs were going up or down.

NOTE:  In the hypnosis CD, Brian Weiss first took me down some stairs, and all of a sudden he was taking me up some stairs, so perhaps that confused me.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

11-24-09 - DREAM -  I was working in a medium size office.  I had a male co-worker and a female boss.  The boss wasn't around so I was typing some esoteric work - copying a document that was about 1/4 to 1/2 inch thick.  There were quite a few big words in it, so I know it was important for others to know.

All of a sudden the boss came into the room and asked me what I was doing.  I told her I was typing a letter and she wanted to see what I was copying it off of.  I managed to throw her off the track by asking her another question about work, and while she answered, I moved some things around in front of me and she forgot what I had been doing a moment before.   As soon as she left, I went back to copying the document.

Later, when I went home I was in process of getting ready to copy 22 CDs, which were also esoteric.  I(t probably means I was making 22 identical copies - not one copy of 22 CDs)

The phone rang and it was Michelle and I started telling her about copying the CDs, and I noticed the light in the room wasn't bright enough so I moved to turn on the light.

I heard a door slam off to my left and that scared me because I thought I was alone.

I woke up with the same thought in my mind.

^^^^

11-25-09 - 3:30 a.m.   DREAM -  (I was not myself - but another person)  My last name was Grady and I think I lived in Ohio because that is what is coming to me, though it was not mentioned in the dream.

I lived in apartment #1 in a large building complex that was over a mine complex  -- (multiple mines)
http://www.lat-long.com/ListLocations-1-Ohio-Mine.html

I was babysitting a young boy about age 7 or younger, but I was getting ready to go on a date with a tall young blonde man to a wedding that was being held in the evening.

I was a tall blonde with long thick hair, which when I looked in the mirror and piled the hair on top of my head in a large top knot, I estimated that I was about 6' 6" tall and that was without high-heeled shoes.

I had a very short blonde girlfriend who was also going to the wedding. She had scrawny blonde hair and wasn't very pretty. She was also very thin.  (Alien ?)She lived in another apartment down the hall. We were supposed to go to the wedding as a double date with two guys.

My date was a tall blonde guy - very handsome, but when he smiled, his mouth opened up really wide like the puppet "Cookie Monster" and that made me very nervous because when I saw him last, he was indicating that all he wanted from our date was sex - but his big mouth scared me.   http://brokenman.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/cookiemonster.jpg

The closer it got to the wedding, which was in the evening, the sicker I felt.

For some reason, when someone stepped on the dark-blue carpet, it left large wet footprints like the underlayment of the carpet was wet and I had to keep putting newspaper down to sop up the water from the carpet.

The little boy I was babysitting made a mess of himself in the bathroom, so I told him to take a shower and then he didn't feel well and said he wanted to go to bed, so I let him because I was trying to think of excuses not to go to the wedding because I was starting to feel sick too.

All of a sudden, a maintenance man dresses in a blue work uniform ran in and called me Ms. Grady.  Thats when I knew I lived in apartment number 1 and I was the manager of the building.

He said, "Ms. Grady! Why is the gas on?"

I said, "I didn't know we had gas! I'm new here!"

He said, "Yes! They use gas ini the mines under here and he ran back out to find out what was wrong.

Right then, all I cared about was that I had an excuse not to go to the wedding.

******************************

11-25-09 - NAP DREAM -  I was living in a house and it was Thanksgiving.  A lot of people were visiting from my family.  I noticed that there were little sticker seeds on the floor, so I asked my daughter to vaccum the carpet because there was a mother there with a newborn baby and she wanted to let it crawl on the floor.

I looked in the next room where there was a crowd of kids and my Father was behind them.  He started yelling at me over their heads, "You aren't doing what I told you to do. You aren't listening to me!"

I yelled back, "How can I hear you when there are 15 people between you and me."

I turned back to the livingroom, and the whole room was empty except for a beautiful blue couch with yellow flowers on it and it was facing a different direction, leaving the whole floor available for the baby to play on.  It looked fabulous.

The baby had to have been a miracle birth because its mother wasn't even pregnant when she went into the hospital, and when she came about out she was carrying a 9 pound baby.  And then she brought it to my house, and the baby was beautiful, and she was going to let it play in 'my' livingroom.

I went into the kitchen then, and my daughter was roasting a turkey.  She got the turkey out of the oven and was bending over it basting it or something and I noticed she had two tiny birds hopping around on her right shoulder.  those little birds weren't afraid of what they were looking at. They trusted that it wouldn't be them.

There was a neighbor woman there and I heard another woman call her Shirley.  Shirley evidently was the woman who had had the baby and wanted to let it play on my livingrom floor. 

I remember calling Shirley's name and she turned and looked at me, but I can't remember what I said to her.

I then went back into the livingroom and the sofa was gone - there was nothing in the room but the blue carpet on the floor. Nothing else. Absolutely nothing.

That crowd of people was still in the next room (that would be where the office is)  and my Father, seeing me at the door, yelled at me again, "You aren't listening to me.  You aren't listening to me."  and again I replied, "I can't hear what you are saying because there are 15 people between us."

and I walked outside to see where Shirley went with the baby.

**************************

11-26-09-  DREAM -  I was looking at a series of newspaper headlines and actually plugging them into a program of some kind on a computer.  The headlines were all about disasters.  The last three were,  "COMETS COMING -  COMETS COMING - COMETS COMING!"

**************************

11-26-09 - DREAM - I was working in a medium size office with some men.  The program on my computer was a file called  tuit2.  This program had to end on December 31st, 2009 and it was all math calculations of some kind.  A new file would be started on January 1st 2010, and would be called  tuit3 .  The men did their calculations at their own desks and the uploaded their files onto my computer when they were complete.  I told them that as of January 1st, they would have to keep their own files on floppies because tuit3 looked like a woman dressed in pink on television giving the news - like the calculations for tuit2 were complete by then.

I wanted to go home and when I went outside I forgot to take my sweater or coat because it didn't seem necessary, but the farther I went along the street, the colder it was getting - I was even seeing snow on the ground where it wasn't before and shouldn't be that cold.  So I went back to the office.

I was walking down the hall at work.  The floor was made of wood with tiny slats - very shiny.  Ahead of me I saw my boss talking to another man and it appeared that the other man was new and was in training to be the new boss.  I had had the same boss for quite some time, so I didn't know how a new boss would be to work with.  I hoped he'd be a good guy and easy to work with but I had no way of knowing.  We hadn't been introduced yet.

When I did go home, I turned on the TV which was quite large and sat on the floor - not on a table.  It was a square box.  The program that came on looked just like my computer screen at work, a lady dressed in pink giving the news.  I tried to change the station and no matter what knob I turned, the same program came on.  I even remarked that it seemed like the knobs on the TV were upsidedown.  I couldn't change the channel no matter what.

*******************************

11-27-09 - DREAM - I was searching for a sacred native Indian community that told the story of a mother and child, and I found many communities that told that story, but I didn't find the correct one.

NOTE: I was looking for a place for Joe and I to live near where T.J. and Sabrina are going to move to north of Sacramento.

I've already looked at Anderson, Happy Valley, Cottonwood, Shasta Lake, and Redding.

**************************

11-27-09 -  VISION - The words  Miranmar and Balincourt.  Then 'Ruth Montgomery', and two extremely beautiful silver scrolled necklaces.  One was hers and one was mine and they were identical.

http://www.dealbase.com/Destin/Majestic-Condos-Seascape-Resort-hotel-deals-4209  which is on the west coast of Mexico.

http://www.balincourt.co.uk/   which is on the west coast of England.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ruth_Montgomery

Montgomery also predicted in the 1970s and 1980s, that America would have a "walk-in" as president in the 1990s, ("unsure which term, 1992 or 1996") before the Polar Shift, which was to happen "in the last months of the century" as it seemed to "the Guides."

NOTE:  President Ronald Reagan was a walkin after he was shot.  If there is another one to come, we just have to wait for a Presidential incident to know.

In the late 1990s, the Guides predicted in her 1999 book, The World To Come, that the walk-in president would not come until 2008 at the earliest, and therefore the Shift would be delayed until 2010-2012 at least. The potential catastrophe of the shift was also reduced by human free will. Except for Florida and the coast of California, the Guides reported, most of America will survive.

NOTE:  My own predictions are the same -  the coastlines of all countries are in danger from tsunamis from the Watermark comet.

****************************

11-27-09 - DREAM - I was in the garage in New Berlin.  I can't remember exactly what I was doing, but seems I was either cleaning or repairing something.

I wanted to go into the house and as I walked away from the garage, I could hear a radio playing, so I went back, found it and turned it off.  Once that radio was off, I could still hear a radio, so I went back, found that radio and turned that one off.

I turned again, and saw a man standing there by a bicycle.  He was bent over it, so I only saw his back and that he was wearing what looked like a mauve colored jump suit - but then I heard a radio in the garage again, so I had to go back and find the third radio -  and woke up.

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11-26-09 - VISIONS -  I a drawing of a comet coming down into the atmosphere.  Then I saw multiple yellow maps of states but I couldn't read any of them.  I just knew it was similar to maps I've seen of states.  I didn't see any large lakes or rivers so it didn't seem to be in the Great Lakes area, nor on a coastline.

NOTE:  This does not seem to match what has been given by others about something hitting the water in an ocean and causing a large tsunami.  It could however be another object than the 'Watermark' comet.

I then saw a document.  It had an official heading, but it wasn't a letterhead.  There was something about a conservancy, and I managed to make out the words "The Red mythology" in the upper left land corner,

NOTE:  Religious wars? http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,914280-4,00.html

 

I also saw a person's arm come out and hand me something and what came to me was "a helping hand".

It also came to me that I should help a tribe here in California, but no details were clear on how to do that, but that it should be in person, not just giving money.

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11-28-09 - VISION - A boy of 10 or 11, who looked like he had lost his hair to cancer, came outside into the sunshine and quickly put on a knitted cap.

NOTE: Joe had a dream in which he met Robert Redford, and he had chemo treatment for cancer and had lost his hair.

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11-28-09 - DREAM - I saw three men dressed like pilots would going into space.  They said they had to do everything right or they could fly.

It wasn't until I woke up that I realized that they looked identical to my guardian angels I was introduced to many years ago.

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11-28-09 - NIGHTMARE IN THE DAYTIME - I was evidently either manager or rental agent at an apartment building.

I was in the office when several girls came in and wanted to see a 2 bedroom apartment for rent.

I didn't know what was for rent, not even which apartments were empty. I didn't know where the records were, where the rental lists were, where the payment lists were - nor even where to find them.

The office got so crowded with people who wanted to see apartments, I couldn't even get through the crowd to go to the files or the desks that were in the back of the office. I finally told one of the women to get out of my way, and she refused to move so I could find the files. 

I was so overwhelmed that I had to wake up.

It was a terrible feeling.

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11-29-09 - DREAM -  I was in a small, white room.  There was a male presence behind me, but I don't know who it was.  However, he was my instructor. 

On a table was a white owl about a foot or so tall.

My instructor told me to take a long cutting knife such as I have in my kitchen for cutting bread.  He told me to slice down through the head of the owl right in front of its ears and cut down through its head.  This happened easily as though there were no bones in the skull.  I sliced down through the head and neck and chest while the owl was alive  -  and when I reached the chest, I reached inside and cut out its heart.  I held the heart in my hand and the heart transformed into a tiny bluebird.

This whole process was bloodless and did not kill the owl.

NOTE: We have a pair of large white owls living high in the pine tree in our front yard.  We don't see them often and never hear them, but two years ago,  I was sitting in a chair at dusk and one of the owls flew out of the tree and flew right over my head. The time before, it was dark outside and something made me look up and the owl was sitting on the very top of the television antenna on top of our house.

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11-29-09 - DREAM - I was at Allis-Chalmers, working.  I don't know what time of day it was, but one of the big bosses came in from outside and I noticed that the sole of his shoe was flapping loose on his right foot.  As he walked down the hall, feeling very embarrassed that I had caught him in such a moment as this, I walked quickly behind him down the hall all the way to his office. The other bosses were in their offices and saw us walk by and when we got to this particular bosses office at the end of the hall, he knew that everyone saw us walk by and he shut himself into his office.

I was smiling the whole way, and when I walked back down the hall to my own office, one of the bosses I worked for daily, named Richard Leiweke, called out to me,  "That's the seventh time you have caught one of those guys in a vulnerable position!" and he smiled, and I smiled.   It just felt good to catch on of the so-called  'better than everyone' types, looking like a street bum.  :-)

It just felt so good. :-)

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11-30-09 - DREAM -  I was in a city somewhere, taking care of my back yard gardens, my children, and my small pets.

I decided to take a walk down the back alley to look at a house farther down the street, and when I got there, it look abandoned, and the back door was open so I went into the yard.  To my surprise, when I got closer to the door, I saw a young man sitting on the floor and he was surrounded by some puppies.  The puppies were light red in color with long ears, and I thought they were cute.  All of a sudden the young man picked up one of the puppies and gave it to me. 

I accepted the puppy, while thinking, "What am I going to do with another dog?"  but I took it anyway and headed for home. He had about 5 more just like it.

When I got home, I realized I hadn't really taken a good look at the puppy, because people started telling me it was a fox.

I didn't really ever get a clear look at the puppy's face, because I know what a fox muzzle looks like, it is sharp and pointed and the ears are pointed, not long like my puppies.  I also knew that it was illegal to have a fox.  But I kept telling myself, it couldn't be a purebred fox - it had been raised in this man's house and must be a mutt type dog instead - mixture of fox and dog perhaps.

Nobody tried to take the puppy away from me, so I just stayed in denial that it was a fox. He was really large for a puppy and foxes aren't that large in the wild.

All of a sudden, I found myself in a school.  It must have been a school for boys because I saw no girls there.  I was in a small room where a young man was being interrogated.  He was sitting sideways along one side of a small table.  I noticed he had light red hair and perhaps some small freckles on his face.  His skin was pale white. 

I heard one of the men say that his young man was a killer, that he had killed earlier that day.  They wanted to make sure he didn't kill again.

I couldn't figure out why they didn't just take him to jail if they were sure he was a killer. 

I saw a small size shotgun on the table, and assumed that was the murder weapon if he had killed.  It was sitting dangerously close to the young man so when the men weren't paying attention to me,  I grabbed the shotgun, and hiding it by holding it alongside my body with my arm, I carried the shotgun down the school hallway to a classroom.

I entered the classroom and saw about 8 boys in the classroom.  They were all seated in a small group in one corner of the room with their male teacher. 

I indicted to the teacher that I was leaving the shotgun with him for his protection in case the killer came into the room.  The teacher just nodded and I left the shotgun laying on his desk and left the room.

I left the school and went outside where I met a woman I knew who looked injured.  She had splotches of some kind of fluid on both sides of her neck like she had been in a fight.  She said she was fine, but she didn't look fine to me.  Over aways, I saw another woman who also had splotches of some kind of fluid on both sides of her neck, and I assumed the two women had been fighting with each other, but I couldn't figure out how they got matching injuries.

I noticed there was quite a bit of trash laying around in the yard of this school.  It seemed to be a campus with grass, rocks and gardens.  I started picking up clothing I saw laying against some of the rocks.  The clothing wasn't clean. It also had some of this fluid on it that perhaps the women had thrown down in their fight.  I never did determine what this fluid was.

I started to wake up, and saw a map of South America from the air. The entire continent was dark brown, and alongside the eastern side of the mountains - all the way down the continent were like three lines of red warning symbols one might see alongside the road indicating danger ahead.

This is the shape:

While I was doing this artwork change - once I found the correct shape of the signs, I realized that I had been looking at the map from the top down like I was in space looking at South America from the perspective of being in the Northern Hemisphere looking south.

So the warning signs were also reverse facing.                                picture 3 rows of these signs all along the eastern side of the mountains the full length of the continent.

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