APRIL, 2004


4-1-04 - DREAM - At a distance, I was watching a couple men  being trained to be REAL men. 

Then I saw a close-up of a woman named Ruth King who was doing the training. She wore a severe black suit dress and had her hair pulled back in a bun at the back of her neck.  She looked more masculine than the men did. 

Then I was with a young man, trying desperately to get engaged to him.

It was even important to him that I wore my socks rolled up the same way he did. 

Then he came and said he really didn't like being in the public eye and was taking a job in SEGROID, Wisconsin. 

I told him that was fine with me - I would go with him anywhere.


4-3-04 - DREAM - (None of this make any sense - I don't know where I was.)

I was in a house or apartment making a collage on a large piece of paper about comedians with brightly colored cartoonish faces next to their names. It wasn't finished but it was a fun project. 

I showed it to my male neighbor who was visiting from next door.

He made some nice comments about it

I shut off the radio and went to sleep:

DREAM - I was working in an office and the boss was away. a young woman came in and said she had been assigned to help me. She was hard to look at - I like half her nose was cut off and not yet healed.

I didn't have anything for her to do either, because my work was done. So I decided I would spend some time teaching her the business. I asked her if she knew anything about mechanical drawing. She said, "No!"  so I thought that would be a good place to start, to show her basic drawings of circles, lines and angles. Without knowing a little of that, you can't read a blueprint or understand anything about what you are typing or what the company makes.

So I went to look for a mechanical drawing she could study and have something to do. 

Everything was filed away, so I started opening doors and drawers for a good example.

First I opened the door to the hallway and it was dark out there - just barely enough light to see several maintenance men standing around. I hollered at them, "Why aren't the lights on out here?" and someone turned them on. At that point, the girl went into the hallway to see what the men were doing.

Back inside the office, I opened another door, which I thought was a closet, but someone had turned it into a small aviary. There was a bunch of chirping birds in it - some different colored canaries and a baby stork with a really long beak. 

I saw seed scattered about on the floor, so I decided I would make sure they had sufficient water. All I found to carry water in was a tiny white pitcher - it probably carried only an ounce of water, but that was better than nothing. 

I filled the pitcher and carried it to the aviary and poured it into a little flask that the baby stork used.

By then, I discovered that all the boxes that had been I the aviary were now on the floor in the office and they all needed sorting and put somewhere else. 

I figured that the girl could help do that, but she was still out in the hallway talking to the maintenance man.

So I went into my bosses office and opened his two drawer file cabinet.

Inside the drawer were many fat files full of maps and drawings. I pulled several of the maps out and they were written on and things circles. and I knew right away that they were maps of Florida  and these were the maps and drawings of the guy in Florida who built Coral Castle.

I decided I'd better put these files back before my boss came back and just as I slid the last file into the drawer,

(The page I wrote this dream out is missing from my notebook)



4-3-04 - (The beginning of this dream is missing from my notebook)

DREAM - My kids then started playing with the light turning them on too bright and then turning them off, so I adjust the window shades so they were exactly half way.

I decided I would go to the bathroom, but on the way past the babies bedroom, I spotted some older women in there by the crib. They were standing there by the crib. They were standing there admiring the baby whom they hadn't seen before.

I didn't know these women personally but they were family relations of my cousin Judy so they were rather relatives of mine too somehow.

After they admired the baby for a few minutes, we all went into the living room to talk and they were all complaining about their ailments like old women tend to do. I admired them for traveling around the country despite their ailments.

There weren't enough chairs in the room, so the older grandma sat on my lap for a bit. As soon as she did, I spotted part of her dress was coming apart in one spot. I was able to pin it together temporarily, but I didn't have needles and thread handy. The old grandma showed me she had made a collection of needles and other sewing notions, but we still didn't have any thread to sew with so I could only pin her dress together temporarily.

These women then went to visit someone who lived down the street in a big plain white house. They said that was a relative too.  I didn't even know who lived there and told myself I should find out who did live there. 

Back at home, Joy Bahar, the comedian and another woman were visiting me and talking to my neighbor (I can't remember her name  now)  - I used to live there in Illinois in 1989)

I was in the kitchen messing around with a colander that had popcorn kernels in it and could overhear their conversation in the next room.

While I was pushing the last good popcorn kernel through the colander holes, leaving only the seed, I heard Joy tell her friend and my neighbor that marriage wouldn't be such a bad idea and my neighbor made a rather sarcastic comment to her. (Joy has a long-term relationship personally)

I was feeling some emotion of love for my neighbor at that moment even though I didn't know him very well. 

I went into the other room then, the living room I think it was. It was kind of messy and there were a bunch of different size pillows on the floor. I was trying to pick out my bed pillows to take upstairs. 

My neighbor walked in and said to me, "Did I hear somebody say how beautiful you are?"  My emotions rose, but not knowing how to answer that, I said, "Awwww! How sweet!" 

In answer to that, he said, "If not, I want my money back." and to that I just laughed.

Then he took one pillow on the floor and got down on one knee and begged me for something, but he mumbled and I couldn't hear what he said.

It looked like he was asking me to marry him, but I barely knew him even though I felt loving feelings for him, and I didn't know how to answer him, so I got down on my knees in front of him on another pillow and was trying to think whether I should ask him to repeat what he said, and he said, "My hair is awfully long, do you think you could cut it for me?"

He stood up and turned around so I could see how long his hair was.

I was relieved not to have to answer the mumbled question, whatever it was, and said, "Sure! I can cut your hair for you - That much I can do for you." 

Even thought I was feeling emotions of love for him, I didn't have to make a life long commitment to him.


4-3-04 - MEDITATION - (I asked if I was from the Star System of Altair)  (per a previous dream)

I immediately had a vision of what looked like a children's magazine. The pages turned over a couple times. The page themselves were divided in half by a center vertical dividing strip that had stars in it and at the top of the page were pictures of cartoon kittens. 

I then was told "Human Consciousness is a baby rabbit in my bedroom slippers. 

Human Consciousness is #54

I then saw the baby rabbit jumped into the public hair my crotch and I had to hold my legs open so I wouldn't crush him. 


4-4-04 - DREAM - I was given a list of things one offers in a church like love, comfort, understanding, sympathy, etc.


4-4-04 - DREAM - Joe's son Mike was my husband. He came out of the bedroom and said he was going across the street. There was another house there.

After he left, I had the TV on and they were showing crystal glassware people could call in and bid on.

I couldn't find the phone or my glasses. The kids pointed out my glasses to me. 

Then I saw how messy the house was and there were tons of kids toys in the way so I could hardly walk across the floor. 

I needed to change the baby's diaper and the changing table was gone.

Other women with babies tried to help me find a surface large enough to lay the baby so it wouldn't fall off which I changed her diaper.

After I did that, I heard a man say, "Turn left on Coldspring." and there were directions to a Greek wedding.

I knew where Coldspring was in Milwaukee, but I don't what town I was even living in. 


4-4-04 - DREAM - I think I just had the exact same dream I had many years ago. I'll write it all down now just in case its in the dream I lost that were from 1980 - 1984.

I was living at 2621 N 16th St. and renting out apartments that were in the corner house across the street that fronted on Clark St. but the side was on 16th St. 

The man who was interested in the apartment called me on the phone and asked a bunch of questions about the apartment and the price. I told him the rent was $590 but he could probably get the deposit down to $365. 

I wasn't ready to show the apartment so I wanted to change clothes before he came, but he kept me on the phone so long with getting the price and instruction on how to get to us via freeway, he was already at the house by the time I got off the phone. 

I whipped the hairbrush through my hair real quick while my daughter just said, "Congratulations Mom. You just wrote a book." 

The portly businessman came in and immediately got a phone call he had to take in private, so while he took the phone call in a room behind the piano, I got acquainted with the driver.

We were very sexually attracted to each other and as things went, I gave the man a hand job and he asked me to marry him. His 'thing' ended up looking like a 'toy soldier' in red, white and blue - like a wooden doll.

We never did go look at the apartment and I didn't have a rental agreement, but from what I understood, the portly man was like the chief of Police and they check up on me first to see who I was and who I had worked for before.

When they left, my baby was so full of poop in his diaper, I had to lay him on the floor and gently peel his little blue romper bottom off of him so he didn't get poop all over everything.


4-5-04 - DREAM - I, my daughter, and Kimber and another young woman were trying to decide where to live. 

Not everyone was happy in California and not everyone was happy in Wisconsin.

Meanwhile, I was taking everything out of one purse and putting everything into another.

I can't remember exactly how this was, but had something to do with either the car or the purse was alive and was a big fat man somehow.

While I was moving stuff over, another guy was making copies of what we were writing and stealing it by reselling it.

I had to send a message to someone in a school and overheard the message being relayed to the messenger girl who was named Erika. "What room is she in"< I yelled back" 525 or 526". 

I then walked upstairs myself and met the principal on the 4th floor and the message still hadn't been delivered and we were chuckling about Ericka liking to walk the halls and see what was going on in the building. We got down to the other end and had to walk over Christmas decorative and gifts that were being brought out and not step on anything.

At that point, I was supposed to give birth to a baby and somehow "she" was supposed to come out of a womb-like egg. 

The female doctor said that she had her all prepared for birth - all I had to do was blow in her face and she'd pop right out.

I could see her brilliant eyes and smiling lips behind what looked like half-open egg opening.

I got ready to blow in her face to make her pop out and lost the rhythm of the breath and had to take a second breath and blew and I was shocked to nothing where I had just seen those brilliant eyes and big smile.

Did I blow them out was she already behind me?


VISION - I got a long e-mail from MILIDIPTIN  SITHIN.  I can remember the words energy & DAATH


4-5-04 - DREAM - I was standing in the grocery store where I had a view of the ladies room door. I saw someone came out of the ladies room and the lights were out in there and they had to use a flashlight to use the facilities.

I wasn't seeing anyone going into the ladies room, but there were lots of little Asian women coming out, each one with a flashlight.

I saw a clerk standing by, and speaking to him of not having lights in the ladies room. I said, "This is really pissing me off. I planned to find Joe and tell him to take me home if I needed to use it. And who were all these little Asian women?


4-5-04 - DREAM - I was in an office with a large computer. Art Bell was interviewing a guy about the energy crisis and lack of oil for the economy. 

On my computer screen I saw was a man sitting at a desk on the telephone and I wanted to ask him about the energy crises and lack of oil, but I wasn't hearing any sound from my computer. I realized that Art Bell was controlling the sound to my computer and it was turned off.

I wanted him to turn my sound on because I realized in the discussion, they were using our (USA) numbers in their calculations and not (OPECS - Saudi Arabia) numbers. We only knew what they were telling us.


4-7-04 - DREAM - I was in a large restaurant. There was a young baby there I had to feed, which I did.

I had a bunch of personal things on a shelf in this restaurant and other people did as well.

I decided to help clean up this restaurant so others could eat at the booth where I was. I had to walk back and forth several times to get water.

The people in this restaurant,  who worked there were all short, dark women, chubby, but with real skinny legs. I kept wondering how they got husbands.

I was shown a red diorama of how the place was going to look at Christmas. It was mostly empty, but at one end, it looked like a corral where everybody would be at one end and fenced in.

I started to wake up and heard a dull bong sound and I asked if there was a message - 

I saw a large beige blanket.  I missed the first couple of words, but it ended, "under the arm of Afghanistan and Pakistan." 

VISION - Two of my sons called me on the phone and asked for the address of Debe their sister-in-law. So I was trying to find my address book, which I couldn't find. By the time I got back to the phone they were no longer there.

VISION - I saw my white ______

I saw a baby wallaby jumping

A silver sparkly school bus picking up a bunch of kids. 


4-7-04 - NAP DREAM - I went outside in a dream and saw like a black and white kids drawing of a UFO in the sky, shining a light beam down.

I woke up and started to write down the dream and the telephone rang. I was in the kitchen next to the refrigerator. I picked the phone up and said, "Hello!".  All I could see was the side of the refrigerator because that's how close I was to it.

The male voice on the other end said, "Dolores?"

I said, "Yes!"

He said, "It's Charles!"

I waited for him to say more - wondering who died in my husband's family, thinking this must be his brother - not realizing he doesn't have a brother Charles.

I could hear people talking faintly in the background - finally I said, "Who is it?", knowing someone died, dreading knowing who it was, thinking it might be my ex-husband.

He finally said, "It' was Tony!"

I said, "Awwww!, which turned into crying and I was crying into the phone.

I could hear Charles say to someone else, "She's crying!"  Then he said to me, "The funeral will be May 31st."

I woke up , thinking, "Wow! Am I psychic or what?" Then I realized my husband doesn't have a brother Charles, maybe not even an uncle Charles, and that May 31st is past. 

Then I had to think, "Does my ex-husband have a brother Tony?" and I realized he doesn't even have a brother Tony - only my sister has a son Tony and my husband's family sure wouldn't call me about my nephew on my Mom's side of the family.

So who is Ton? and Who is Charles? 

NOTE:  Thinking -  Prince/King Charles -  Tony Blair? 


4-8-04 - DREAM -  I was working in a large warehouse. When I left to go home, my car got dragged out of the parking lot and I couldn't beep the horn or turn on the lights to let him know because the key wasn't in the ignition.

The cars separated when we hit the street and I skidded to a stop in an area where men were repairing the street. I just stopped in time from going in a big pit. 

I drove out of there okay and then followed a guy into a frozen food storage warehouse.

There, they offered me donuts and bread on a side restaurant, which I couldn't, so they gave me strawberry pudding instead. It was wonderful. 

As a reward, I saw two men, one behind the other in grey suits, and two pink women's arms and one woman behind the other.


4-8-04 - DREAM - I was in my old apartment building. I was told I wouldn't want the manager's job now because they were putting the office in #210 and other people sat around with their feet on the railings of the balcony. 

At the end, I saw a beautiful older woman sitting in the office.  It wasn't me, but it could've been me. I was impressed by her.


4-8-04 - DREAM - I was dreaming about cleaning the bare floors in my house with a water hose after passing a woman on the back stoop who had an intriguing machine on her back stoop. 

I started squirting the water on the floor, then realized that the water would go down the furnace grate, would soak the carpet, then it forced me to clean down the back stairs, because the more I did this way, the more there was to do. 

Then I noticed two black men by the basement door ready to go downstairs. I can't say I understand this, but I placed a crystal sugar bowl on the shoulder of the most powerful black man. I knew this was a dangerous thing to do and would bring bad consequences, so I removed it myself, rather than requiring the man in the family to defend my honor.

I went out in the back courtyard and my best friend Alice went into the church and closed the door,, which was like a blue sliding door, like Alice-In-Wonderland may have seen in the side of a tree. The door was closed tight and I tried a variety of ways to open that door without success, so I decided that "sound" would open that door.

I woke up thinking that and a voice in my head sang to me in a falsetto voice, "You'd a never made it ba-be"!

(Big smile!  It was a joke)


4-8-04 - Last night while listening to the radio, the person being interviewed used the words super-luminous beings and the light in the room came on by itself with a humming-whooshing sound and flashed bright and then dimmed down to darkness again. The light didn't click on and off like when you turn it on by itself.


4-9-04 - VOICE - after I heard a bell ring in my left ear. "This disclosure will awaken the world." 


4-9-04 - DREAM - I was sitting in a car with John McBain from One Life to Live TV show. We had just become engaged and were sitting in the car, nuzzling each other - touching very gently, heads, necks, shoulders, fingers - just feeling the energy between us. We were sitting n the car at a big mall just enjoying the feelings. 

4-9-04 - VOICE - I woke up from the dream and I heard Joe's voice in my left ear, "I am leaving." 

I didn't know if that meant he was leaving for work or leaving me for good - or dying.

I didn't hear any sound in the house but the TV playing in the next room. 


4-9-04 - I fell asleep again and was with John again in a living room. John was sitting up on the arm of the sofa and I was sitting down on the sofa next to him. 

We were playing with each others fingers enjoying the energy play.

I didn't really know what to say to him, so I said, "We should get you a chair that you can be comfortable in. "

He merely said, "Okay!"

So then I said, "What kind of Christmas celebrations do you like?" trying to keep the conversation safe and non-committal. 

He said, "I like big celebrations with lots of people."

I immediately thought about how much work that was, but if it was for him, I could do it. But I said, "That's the kind of parties we have in the astral places."

Instead of asking me any questions back to that statement, he just said, "Oh!"

I was getting nowhere fast with him, but I didn't want to push him into a conversational corner he would feel uncomfortable either.

I finally went into the kitchen to look for chicken bones to make a necklace to hang my engagement ring on around my neck. (what?)

I had all kinds of tiny carved wooden chickens but that didn't make any kind of sense and a voice behind me said, "You need a 'wish bone'. "

Somehow that made more sense and I said, "Okay!" but I didn't have any of those.

I next found myself laying in bed, just having woken up and laying there thinking about the lovely feelings between me and John. Finally I knew I had to get up and take a shower  and go get my hair done at the beauty parlor, because I was going to go shopping with my friend Donna and then go to work. 

I also knew I was really late and I hadn't been getting to work on time for days and wondered shy they didn't fire me. I had to be there are 10:30 am and I worked on the 25th floor.

I finally got up, and hearing voices downstairs, I looked over the banister by the stairs to see three men and a couple pregnant women and some young children below. 

I just said, "Uncle"! (because I didn't know anyone's name) and one good looking mustached man looked up - I said, "I'm running really late, but I still need to take a shower and get my hair done."

He said, "Okay!" so I figured everything was okay. 

I was in my pink bathrobe and went outside to have a smoke.  (I don't smoke) 

I was walking down the street, trying to open the pack by pulling on the cellophane zipper not doing very well and a car pulled up next to me and said, "Those strips sometimes twist right and sometimes they twist left."

I said, "Thanks!, but I sensed something wrong and ran back between two houses, hoping to get inside for safety. 

There was another woman there too, entering at the same time. We went into the back hall, both intending to go upstairs to the second floor. There was no stairway that went all the way up, just four or 5 stairs that went up to the kitchen of the first floor. 

Neither one of us had a key to get into this house either, because neither of us lived here.

I decided to try to turn the knob and hoped for the best - and the door opened.

We went inside the kitchen, feeling relieved, but then I saw two men in the living room - the guy from the car was holding a knife up against the man who lived in the house. 

I immediately grabbed a knife in the kitchen and prepared to throw it at the man from a distance.

But the man turned to face me and stuck his own knife into his own stomach about an inch . I saw no blood. He pulled the knife out and stuck it back in. 

I thought he was trying to commit suicide, but he didn't even react to the pain and there was no blood.

I was still trying to figure out how to throw the knife at the guy, but he was getting closer and closer, so finally I just stuck my knife into the man's belly.

Nothing happened and there was no blood either, so I pulled the knife out and plunged it in again in a different spot. 

I was imagining how this must be ripping up the guy's guts, but there was still no blood.

The guy just stood there and I started plunging my knife into this guy's body over and over, trying to find his heart, trying to make him bleed, but he still didn't bleed.

I had already stabbed him about 12 times and there was still no blood - he just stood there staring at me with a weird look on his face.

I woke up then, my heart pounding really hard in fear.

I heard a bell ring in my left ear. I said, "I'm ready for a message."

Nothing came - just silence.

I started thinking about my dream again - then suddenly heard in my left ear - "This disclosure should awaken the world." 


4-10-04 - DREAM - I was visiting a friend's apartment on the south side of Milwaukee on my lunch hour at noon. I didn't live too far from her, but we drove in her car.

When we left her place, she took a road that was mostly paved and unmarked that went over a huge hill. 

We were about 3/4 of the way up the hill when I discovered that I had forgotten my purse at her apartment. 

I figured she could just go around the block and go back or make a left turn at the next driveway and go back the way we came, but she didn't want to do another one - she stopped the car right where we were - right in traffic, letting me sit I the car, and walked back to her apartment to retrieve my purse.

We had no sooner stopped the car and of course the car behind us had to stop also. Instead of passing us, the two older ladies got out of their car and came up to where I was sitting in the car to engage me in conversation.

I really had to get back to work and get home to my apartment which was right at the top of the hill, so I and the two ladies decided to walk the rest of the way.

Since the road was smooth and newly paved, it was an easy walk. I couldn't drive my friends car because she had taken the key with her.

So, there I was back at my apartment building and I still couldn't get into my apartment because I didn't have my keys which were in my purse at my friends apartment so I just had to sit and wait.

I was looking out the window, looking at a large yellow wall that the ETs had built that people couldn't see past, but it had started to separate along the seams.

While I was looking at the wall, I noticed that the cloud in the sky was moving rapidly and then made an 'L' turn in the sky and then continued on.

This all astonished me. I wanted to tell someone about it, so I had witnesses.

There were two young men, sitting at school desk in the hallway. One of them was talking a lot like he was trying to entertain the other one. I assumed they were waiting for job interviews.

So I walked up to them and said, "Did you ever see clouds in the sky move in an 'L' shape?

They hadn't so, they went to the window to look and watch.

I still couldn't go to my apartment and my friend hadn't arrived with my purse yet, so I decided to go back to work, which was at the end of this same building.

As soon as I got to my desk, the telephone rang. It was my spiritual teacher who wanted me to meet him at a restaurant for lunch so he could tell me something.

I wrote down the address of the restaurant which was at the corner at the bottom of the hill where I had just come from. 

I looked at the clock and it was 12:25 p.m.  I didn't catch whether the teacher said to meet him at 12:30 or at 1 p.m. Besides that my boss Richard was standing right there by his desk and knew I had just got back from lunch. He was going to leave for lunch but that wasn't the problem. What if he went to the same restaurant for lunch and saw me sneaking out for a second lunch hour?

Besides that, I would have to walk because my friend still hadn't brought my purse and keys to me, so I couldn't drive there. and I could call the Teacher back because then his secretary might answer the phone if the teacher had already left for lunch.

What a dilemma.


4-11-04 - DREAM - I was given the opportunity to go to an observatory to watch Comet #8 go by the earth. 

The man handed me a special mesh webbed headgear to wear for the event.

I took off my baseball cap to put on the headgear. It was shaped like a baseball cap on to but had a tight mesh face mask over it like a welder's mask except this had a narrow slit in front of the eyes to see the comet and not get pocked in the face by the debris that was expected to be accompanying the comet flyby.

There had been 7 comets previous t o this and comets ARE dangerous. 


updated 1-5-05  -INCOMING COMETS




4-12-05 - DREAM - I went to a school meeting in a large room. This was some sort of introduction to the college my daughter was going to attend. I evidently had missed an earlier parent's meeting, so they were bringing me papers individually.

I then realized I didn't have my keys with me and my apartment was right upstairs. Since I didn't have my keys I assumed I had left the door unlocked too. I went up there and the door was slightly ajar. That really worried me, so I ran inside and everything looked like someone had ransacked the place. I was mostly worried about my purse. I found my purse sitting on a chair and it was open. I was amazed when I looked inside - I saw a $1,000 bill, a $500 bill and a $1 bill. It appeared that someone had 'given' me money - not taken it.


4-13-04 - DREAM - I was at the Pentagon, observing two women interact with each other. They were considering letting one of the women go because she wasn't getting along with the other woman.

As it turned out, it was all because of a man they were both interested in and he was playing one woman against the other.

I told the personnel supervisor that I could settle the problem by talking to the man. I just needed to ask him one question he could answer "yes' or 'no' to.

She agreed I could do this, so I met the man and told him I had a question to ask him and all he had to do was answer 'yes' or 'no'.

We needed some privacy to do this, so I suggested we find a place to be alone. 

There was a slight problem with this. As soon as I said that, he started coming on to me. I got squeamish then because he was missing his left hand. His arm ended at the writ and he tried putting that arm around my shoulder to direct me which way to go.

I moved out of his way, but as we went down the hall, there were people everywhere and there was no privacy.

He indicated that we should take the elevator to another floor. The elevator door opened and it seemed awfully dark, but there was another man on the elevator so I entered.

As soon as I got on, I saw that the elevator was also the men's bathroom. As soon as the door closed, the elevator went up went up a floor so fast. I actually got queasy in the stomach. As soon as the door opened, I got off as fast as I could.

We came to an area where there were a couple school desk where people could sit and fill out forms, so he sat down at one and I stood nearby so I could talk quietly and ask my question.

He now looked like a young 15 year old boy and very scared. I was wondering why either woman would want to date such a young kid.

But I had to ask him my question. I asked, "Are you married?"

He looked up at me and his face started aging as he spoke. He said, "I was!"

That's all I needed to know - whether he was single and eligible or married - trying to have a fling.

But now he was visibly upset. He said, "I was married for 5 years. How would you like to be 27 years old, married 5 years and get dumped?"

Now he looked 35 or more and even grew wrinkles, but as he got emotional over his marital crisis, he face got younger and younger and I could see that he played for sympathy from these women and brought out their motherly instincts to take care of him.

I woke up before I needed to tell anyone about him.


4-14-04 - DREAM - I was working in a large apartment complex, both for and against rivals. They were tough as nails inside but appeared as nice as anyone else on the inside, but appeared as nice as anyone else on the outside. They couldn't be trusted though and at one point they tried to get me to drink some yellow liquor from a broken crystal long-stemmed glass. 

I deliberately insulted them to show I 'knew' what they were and called it, 'glass' as I smashed it to smithereens right in front of them.

A previous tenant came to look at an apartment and I asked where the vacant apartment were since I hadn't worked this complex before. They said they wanted to show her one dorm at the next block next to some nasty guy. I didn't want credit for a bad rental, so I offered it to a male rival rental agent to do - he got paid by the rental. I got paid no matter what I did, so he went instead of me.

I woke up just as they were putting the vehicle away - it was like a big _____.

Somewhere in there, Joe's son Mike showed up and said he was trying to sell 3 empty lots in Turlock (CA) that were on sale at $43,000 a piece. I told him to be sure and show Joe those and I wanted the one on the corner because it had more land. 


4-17-04 - TWO VISIONS

A dark colored Chimpanzee sitting down in a diaper full of shit.

a blonde woman, wearing a bathing suit and high heels, climbing the stairs of a white airplane.

On the stairs of the plane, behind her, was sitting the same chimpanzee, wearing a clean diaper and a princess-type crown on its head.


4-18-04 - DREAM - I was in a small town in Illinois. I was there with 5 other people as a study group. There were 3 men and 3 women, each with a problem spouse.

In the beginning, we were taken to a schoolroom where we were going to answer questionnaires.  Before we took the tests however, we all had to find a place to live because out spouses were going to join us.

We were shown to the schoolroom and introduced to the psychiatrist who was going to give us the test and use our answers for some kind of study.

Then we went back to a room where we had a newspaper with the ads for apartments which we were going to rent, and then find jobs.

I don't remember hearing how long we were going to stay there for this study.

I had a good job in Milwaukee already, but this small town in Illinois was a nice place to live - a quiet, peaceful place.

In the apartment hunting process, none of did very well. Nobody wanted to rent to us. I figured I could commute if I had to, though I was very reluctant to do all that traveling. We would have to make that decision shortly if we were going to participate.

Towards evening, our spouses arrived. Mine had just been released from prison, clean of drugs and sober. I don't know the status of the other spouses. I can only assume they had similar backgrounds.

We sat down and discussed the fact that we hadn't been able to rent one apartment -that maybe the people in the town knew who we were and didn't want problem tenants. We had no way of knowing for sure.

As it was, we met in one room again with our spouses and everyone was introduced - not necessarily by name. The spouses all seemed to related to each other real well.

Then I found out that one of the guys had bought some white pills and was selling them to the other spouses so they could get high.

I begged one of the guys not to sell any to my husband. He said it was too late - my husband had already bought some.

Since I hadn't given him any money, I didn't know where he got the $50 to buy the pills. I didn't want to speculate on the possibilities.

I went to another room then, where my husband was standing - he was weaving back and forth, holding a tall green candle hat was lit, thoroughly enjoying himself - all by himself.

He indicated that we should go out in the hallway and talk to the other people. I indicated back that we should go outside on the patio instead because of the candle and smoke it was making,'

He went outside ahead of me. A couple of minutes later, I went outside too. 

Part our study was going to be revealing what our parent/families responded to our spouses and their lifestyles.

In the newspaper, a nice little poem was published - about relationships. I pointed it out to the psychiatrist and suggested that he copy it and distribute it to the others.

I then went outside and overheard one of the other women telling someone how her father reacted to her spouse. I felt almost happy that my case wasn't the worst one.

I woke up then, knowing that my situation was nowhere as bad as some others.


I remembered later that the psychiatrist had 79 'bones' to worry over. I thought about this a few times. Then I saw 6 thank you letters that the psychiatrist was going to send to the participating couples.

I saw that it was signed with the name Lorenzo _______ and beneath that, was the word LORD.

The 'O' was filled in with a design or a smiley face.


4-20-04 - The radio was on while I was sleeping. It was an interview about chemtrails.

DREAM - I was in a large room and there were 20 white military Navy hats laying side by side on a long table. Theses hats represented 5 men and 4 levels and was about chemtrails.

My attention was brought to a young boy about seven years old. He was crying softly. As I went over to him, I saw that over in a corner, he had fresh red blood trickling down his throat like he had a new tracheotomy.

I asked him what was wrong. 

He said he was having trouble breathing from the chemtrails and nobody was listening to him. 

I felt really bad for him.

I then lost my right shoe and a big fat black dog grabbed it. I was afraid the dog would growl at me if I grabbed it right back, but she didn't and she finally let loose of it. 

I went outside then with the big black dog and there were three other dogs outside, ranging in color from all black to all white - laying side by side.

Then a little black and white dog came across the street and my dogs looked like they might growl at it, but I assured them the black and white dog was okay, so they all laid quietly in a circle. 

I then went in the house and had to get ready for work. I looked in the mirror and saw that my skin was all dry and flaky. So I put face cream on and it was too thick and white, so I tried putting liquid makeup over it and that didn't look good either, so I took white tissues and wiped the whole thing off again. At least my skin was no longer dry and flaky.

I not sooner got dressed and my boss - Mr. Reich walked in with his black overcoat on. He was going to have a conference with some other men, but first he handed me two purchase orders he had signed and told me to process them, so I put them in a folder to take to my desk.

Then I noticed there was children's toys all over the floor and they had to be picked up. I was embarrassed that those other businessmen had seen the mess.  So I got help from another woman to get it all cleaned up.

I sat down on a sofa with a young woman and I took her hand and held it for a few minutes and thought maybe I was turning gay, but then I saw a navy military man, dressed all in white came down the hall and he went into the apartment across the hall. I immediately knew I wasn't gay.

The tall military Navy man, still in his white uniform, then went out into the lecture hall down a bit from my apartment and I went down then to see what he had to say.

He stood in front of the accumulated people and started telling them his dreams. The first one he addressed specifically. He said, "You'll be glad to know the Raiders are going to win this year."  (This didn't happen  :-(  )

I got a big smile on my face. 

Then I knew we should have a dream telling contest and give a prize for the best one. 


4-21-04 - DREAM - I was teaching two tiny kids about the pyramids. All of a sudden, I saw this name hanging in the air, "Wedgewood, Graham, Edgar and now I knew everything there was to know about the pyramids.

But it wasn't long and I had 15 tiny little kids to take care of.



4-22-04 - DREAM snippets:

A repeat of a vague dream of a King in a cave.  There was a 5 or 6 digit number associated with this.

A repeat of a vague dream of a Queen in a cave.  There was a 5 digit number associated with her.


4-22-04 - DREAM - My girlfriend Donna and myself were in a hospital-like setting and we harvested our own eggs from our vagina at the same time because our cycles were identical. We carried them in our arms and gave them to the lab technician, who just nonchalantly took them from us, saying to me, "Thanks! You always were good in your lab job."  We used no normal procedure of health or safety, nor was it like normal life hygenics or real life physiology. We just reached into our vagina which were like long open tunnels a foot across and plucked out what looked like layered plates of white mushrooms. There was absolutely no blood or fluids involved and we didn't use gloves - just bare hands.


4-23-04 -    DREAM - I seemed to be at my friend Michelle's house, but people from Milwaukee were there also. We were expecting guests to come to stay for a 4-day weekend. A little while later, some other people said they were coming to stay for two weeks.

Meanwhile, the house was a mess. There were too many knickknacks on the tables, too many dirty dishes standing around that people hadn't put into the kitchen sink to wash, too many toys on the floor. There were family members everywhere, but just standing around talking to each other.

I assigned little tasks to individuals - one in particular was a collection of purple and white monkey bones. I asked one kid (my son) if he would put those into a box and then vacuum the floor carpet.

One room was covered in water - the other floors were dry but messy and stuff on the floor everywhere.

It didn't help that there was a brown monkey gamboling around my legs and grabbing a leg now and then either.

Then I got a phone call from work that they couldn't find some payroll accounting papers for some women's payroll sheets, so I had to go to the office and help find those because the payroll accountant (Nancy) had gone home early. There were a bunch of us looking for those sheets and we never did find them.

In another apartment down the hall a woman was having her green carpet cleaned, but not the part by the door. I had to explain to her that the part that didn't get clean would end up a different color. Meanwhile she was hanging a 4 x 6 piece of new green carpet on the wall as a decoration so she could remember what it looked like originally.

I finally got back to cleaning and one woman said she met Michelle at the airport. She was coming in with the child Nicholas (no person we know)

I tried giving a white teddy bear to a little boy to take upstairs and he refused. 

I said to myself, "Some boys you just feel like hitting somehow". 

At that point I was outside, surrounded by 8 foot tall humanoid being or statues. None of them moved but they sure looked alive.

I went back inside and continued cleaning, trying to get it done by assigning little tasks to other people. 

I finally woke up, feeling very frustrated.

I then heard a voice in my head say:  "These might be a changing of the context of the lessons learned." 


4-23-04 - DREAM - I had a series of dreams which showed me a variety of ways people were killed in the past  -particularly like in domestic violence. 


4-23-04 - DREAM - I was at my Mom's house. I got a phone call from my girlfriend Terry and while we were talking, on of her daughters showed up at the house. While she was there, I was working on some knitting and having a problem getting the yarn to go into the previous rows the way I wanted to.

My brother Marty was there at the time.

Then an older man showed up at the door, wearing a bright green Aran-type knitted seater and he had a bright blue knitted scarf draped over his shoulders. 

At first I thought he was interested in my knitting or even in me, but then he went over and stood more or less behind my Mom.

I was sitting there thinking about my knitting and that if I ran out of bright green, I could finish with bright blue because those two colors went well together.

All of a sudden my Mom showed extreme anger on her face and she looked at the man and told him forcefully, "Get out!". Then man practically ran out of the house.

I then had to sit there and wonder what kind of relationship my Mom and that man had with each other.

I was then sitting there eating some leaf lettuce and thinking how sweet it was, but then put the leftover leaf lettuce into an animal cage on the floor and the lettuce started moving across the floor of the cage.

There were many ants on and around the lettuce and I thought the ants were dragging the lettuce around, but then I saw what the real culprit was. It was a huge, thick, bright yellow snake. When I saw the snake, it raise dup its head and then its whole body and stood on its tail.

Then I woke up and heard a phone ring in my right ear. I said, "I'm ready for a message and it came and said, "There might be a changing of the context of the lessons learned."


Sorry! I realize I've written it twice and can't remember exactly after which dream I really heard it.


4-23-04 I had a clear voice message this morning.

First I must tell you the dreams that came before it.  I had several in which I was shown how people were hurt or killed in domestic violence (just the images - not the action. The images were black patterns - like burned into the ceiling - the most memorable one was the shape of a flat-iron)
Then I had a dream in which I was with my Mom in a house and I was knitting a pattern and I couldn't get the yarn to go into the pattern in the
right direction and had to twist the yarn backwards to get it in the pattern. I saw my brother standing there watching me. Then I got a phone call and my old girlfriend Terry was on the phone and at the same time her daughter came and I was showing her my knitting. 

Then a man arrived at the door. He was wearing a tweed cap and a bright green sweater with a bright blue scarf around his neck. He stood by me at first and then he went and stood rather behind my Mom.  While he stood there, I was thinking that if I ran out of bright green yarn on my knitting project, I could finish it with bright blue because the colors went together so well.

But then, my Mom's face started turning black with anger and she looked at the man and yelled forcefully at him, "Get out!!!" and the man went scurrying out of the house.  I then had to wonder what relationship my Mom had with that man that she should get so angry at him. He wasn't even speaking to us.

I then sat there, eating a huge leaf of bright green lettuce and it was really sweet, but I didn't finish eating the lettuce, I took it over and put it into
an yellow animal cage on the floor. I observed the lettuce leaf moving across the floor of the cage by itself, and saw numerous little ants pulling it,
riding on it and eating it, but it was moving really fast. Then I saw what was really moving the lettuce leaf - all of a sudden a thick bright yellow
snake rose up from under the lettuce leaf and stood up on its tail and looked at me.

I woke up and heard a telephone ring in my right ear. I asked for the message and it came:  "There might be a change in the context of the
lessons learned." 

End of dream and message.

Joe says the colors represent the chakras and the snake is the kundalini.
But what else does it mean?

NOTE: A relative of Joe contacted me late that same evening and related to me a story which was very similar to the abuse I went through before  I got my divorce in 1980.  A friend of mine then related to me events in her life that were way worse than my own. Made me feel very relieved that mine weren't as bad as I thought they were.


4-24-04 - DREAM - I was in my house trying to clean. My living room was sunken and covered with 4 inches of water. I was upset because I couldn't keep the water from coming in. Besides that, water kept falling from the ceiling and my hair was drenched and falling into my face.

I finally got mad and decided to go shopping instead of continuously fighting with all this uncontrollable water.

So I went shopping and went into the coat department at the mall.

The first coat I saw was a black and white raincoat. I had a windblown tornado -shaped pattern on it. It was a size 21. I held it up on myself and the waistline only came 1/4 of the way around me. I looked at the larger sizes and all they had was yellow. There were no other color choices.

So I went home again to my water problem. A friend of mine suggested we go to the library together. I said, "Okay!" but she left ahead of me. I followed her all the way down a long hallway, past many rooms but I could catch up with her. When I got to the other end, I found many people all leaving to go home.

So, I headed back down that long hall and half way back, I came across an area that had Christmas gifts nobody had picked up. Within arm's reach were several large family size crock pots.

I decided to take one as long as they were just sitting there unused. I tried picking one up and just got the inner warming pot. Meanwhile, the silver outer layer with the warming mechanism started flashing announcements at me.  It said: 

"France can't control warming"
"US awards warming contract to INESCO."
"INESCO can't control warming."
"US decimates warming."
"US controls warming."

That made me happy and I used two hands and took the whole crock pot home with me. 



 My question: How can the US decimate warming?
 What does that mean exactly?

SEE:  UNESCO: global warming links


4-25-04 - DREAM/VISION - I was talking to my friend Wendy on the cell phone. She was actually on a train, going to Concord. I had a vision of the seating numbers on the train car she was in: 


I said, "Oh, they double-booked the train?

She said, "Oh, Is that what that is?"

I asked, "Where is Dave?"  (her boyfriend) 

She said, "He's on his way to Concord."

I asked, "When do you get in?"

So she asked the conductor the question," When do we get to Concord?"

I heard a deep male voice myself.  He said, "They dock at 10 p.m."

 Joe says that the name Concord mean, "Hearts together".

The dictionary gives these other meanings:

  1. [n]  the first battle of the American Revolution (April 19, 1775)
  2. [n]  agreement of opinions
  3. [n]  town in eastern Massachusetts near Boston where the first battle of the American Revolution was fought
  4. [n]  capital of the state of New Hampshire; located in south central New Hampshire on the Merrimack river
  5. [n]  the determination of grammatical inflection on the basis of word relations
  6. [n]  a harmonious state of things in general and of their properties (as of colors and sounds); congruity of parts with one another and with the whole
  7. [v]  be in accord; be in agreement; "We agreed on the terms of the settlement"; "I can't agree with you!"; "I hold with those you say life is sacred"; "Both philosophers concord on this point"
  8. [v]  arrange the words of a text so as to create a concordance; "The team concorded several thousand nouns, verbs, and adjectives"
  9. [v]  arrange by concord or agreement; "Concord the conditions for the marriage of the Prince of Wales with a commoner"
  10. [v]  go together; "The colors don't harmonize"; "Their ideas concorded"
  Synonyms:   accord, agree, agree, agreement, capital of New Hampshire, concordance, concordance, concur, consort, fit in, harmonise, harmonize, harmony, harmony, hold, Lexington, Lexington and Concord

Concord, properly speaking, is between one man and another, in so far as the wills of various hearts agree together in consenting to the same thing. Now the heart of one man may happen to tend to diverse things, and this in two ways. First, in respect of the diverse appetitive powers: thus the sensitive appetite tends sometimes to that which is opposed to the rational appetite, according to Gal. 5:17: "The flesh lusteth against the spirit." Secondly, in so far as one and the same appetitive power tends to diverse objects of appetite, which it cannot obtain all at the same time: so that there must needs be a clashing of the movements of the appetite. Now the union of such movements is essential to peace, because man's heart is not at peace, so long as he has not what he wants, or if, having what he wants, there still remains something for him to want, and which he cannot have at the same time. On the other hand this union is not essential to concord: wherefore concord denotes union of appetites among various persons, while peace denotes, in addition to this union, the union of the appetites even in one man.


4-26-04 - DREAM - I had some large postcards with pictures on the front and lists of things to do on the back.

We lived on one side of the street and I worked on the other side of the street.

The kids had a pet squirrel and Joe and other people were looking for him on the wrong side of the street. I sent him home with the kids so I could get my work done.

But there was a black man with his own pet squirrel laying on a bench by the front door. The squirrel was running around the bench to -right by the man's face so Joe and the other people assumed that our squirrel was there too, when I had sent him home earlier with the kids.

I had finished my knitting projects and toy teddy bear making projects for Christmas and was picking them up, when I spotted a beautiful golden brown neck scar I had forgotten about, so I picked that up to take with me.

Joe was still looking for the squirrel and I hadn't yet told him the squirrel was already at home.

Then Joe and another man needed me to type some little notes out - rather copying some handwritten notes someone else had written.

The other squirrel owner (the black man) was standing there, waiting for me to finish so he could use the typewriter.

I finished what  I had typed except for the last line which got into the wrong place, so I backspace erased it, planning to shift the paper and retype it as this was going to be Xeroxed for many people. One side of the paper had a header of red roses on it and I hoped that the white erased typing error wouldn't show, but figured if the red roses didn't show through the paper, my white typing error wouldn't show either. 

Joe and the man were all effusive with compliments over me being able to copy the three notes, and I said, "It's obvious you don't have any idea of what a secretary does."

I finished the work and we headed out the door, where there was a big commotion going on.

A little girl had vomited in the lobby of the building and they were trying to clean it up. Meanwhile the mother was freaking out, running outside with her hand over her mouth in panic.  They were pouring water on the vomit and trying to vacuum it up.

I told them, it would be easier to pour water on it and just sweep it down into the street gutter.

They attempted to do that, but they didn't use enough water and didn't use the broom.

I decided I would borrow the broom from apartment 111 and get the job done faster myself.

When I tried pouring water on the vomit, I ended up watering a circle of newly planted flowers in a barrel instead. I made sure they were okay before I went to get the broom.

Before I finished, my friend Alyse yelled out the window at me, "Your fish stick candle dinner is ready to eat! Come in before it gets gold."

I yelled back, "Okay!" and woke up.


4-27-04 - DREAM - I was in New Berlin, WI at home. The landlord sent a small/short dark-haired woman to the house to put rat poison in strategic places around the house. This made me really upset because I had little kids and animals in the house that might get into it.

The rat poison was in a tall, narrow, red car with black writing and a black cap on it. Our house was large, so it was taking her quite awhile. But at the first opportunity, I picked up the red can of rat poison and threw it outside into the darkness. 

Then when she came back into the room to get the can the next time, I let all my little light brown roly-poly puppies out to run around and fed them raw hamburger in dishes on the floor.

There were a number of puppies and they were really cute with curly fur and I hope they would distract her.

Then when the puppies were running around, I realized they would have to go outside to go potty and that's where the can of rat poison was, I thought to myself, "Oh no! What have I done?"

I didn't have time to worry about it long because there was one puppy in the corner that looked like a huge bull dog and he stood up on his hind legs and then looked like a fat 10 year old boy and he seemed rather scary.

One of the puppies was laying in a nice dog bed and he turned into a baby boy. At first I thought the back of his head was flat from laying around too long in one position, but he grew really fast and then stood up on his feet.

He stepped out of the basket and toddled towards me. I was rather astonished and praised him for walking and be astonished me again by saying, "What is the point of this?"

I said to him, "All over the world people are dancing.  In every city of the world, there are dancing people."


4-27-04 - DREAM - I was at home somewhere and a whole lot of women and girls came to the house. We were supposed to be getting all these people ready for a wedding.

The women brought all their crafts and handiwork with them. Some of them were into making dolls, putting faces and hair on the dolls by hand. They showed me what they did, but I said I wasn't really interested.

But one of the women brought a tablecloth that was hand embroidered. There were numerous patterns on the front in greens and yellows and every thread went up and down.  (I want to say north and south)

I looked at the back side to see how neat the back was and she did use diagonal stitches on the back but each design was done separately. I really admired the table cloth. It was beautifully done.

A man came who was also doing doll's heads. He was a rather strong, powerful man, dressed in a thick, black wool turtleneck sweater. I'm not sure if his pants were black but they may have been.

This was not going to be a dance (like a square in a square dance, or in front of him like, in a regular dance. I was placed behind him. He held his hands high in the air and I had to hold his hands and that force me to stand very close to him. 

I said, "If I was shorter, I could stand farther back." 

As it was, we somehow got into a bedroom where he threw me down on the bed. Then I saw that he had a huge hypodermic needle in his left hand and he intended to use it on me.

At first I thought he was kidding, but he wasn't acting like it was a joke, so I said, "You aren't kidding are you?" and I wrapped him up in the blanket so he could get me with the hypodermic needle. It had to be at least 2 or 2 1/2 feet long.

I went back out to the party and I saw that one of the girls had been playing around and knocked down the curtains in one of the girls' bedrooms. I couldn't believe how dirty they were on top, so I knew I would have to wash them before I hung them back up and then I would have to wash all the other curtains too, one day at a time for each room until they were all done.

Meantime, I was sorting out clean laundry and stacking the winter sweaters by the closet door and stacking them up for winter.

I saw the bride arrive then. She was a little on the chubby side, not real tall, but her dress was short also with an over-veil that glittered in the sunlight. I don't know if it had sequins on it or what, but it was beautiful.

At a distance, I saw them carry her into a bowling alley or mall that had an escalator doing down and they sat her on the railing on the side of the escalator and she rode it down - with a big smile on her face.

Somehow then, my father, and I got the man dressed in black into a delivery van. I was going to drive and my father was on my right. Between us there was a yellow rectangular metal can (like candy would come in). It was full of cash. My gather had it stashed behind two beer cans to hide it from prying eyes. 

The man in black was standing up behind me and I yelled at him several time, "SIT DOWN!" and he didn't I yelled again, "SIT DOWN!".

I went to turn on the engine and discovered it had been on all the time. It was absolutely silent.

Instead of a steering wheel, there was a one-handled joy-stick, a gas pedal and brake were on the floor. It was very awkward to steer with the joy-stick, but I managed to back out of the garage without hitting anything, then I had to drive down the alley where short pipes were sticking up and I had to drive over them. I think these pipes and a small propane tank belonged to the gas station. I drove over the pipes and around the building. 

The man in black was now an obnoxious kid in a red sweater and he jumped out of the van and ran ahead of us into the gas station, telling them he wanted candy.


4-28-04 - DREAM - I was laying in bed in my apartment. It was the middle of the night and my husband had called and told me he had a problem at work and he had to stay until it was fixed.  (The water treatment plant)

I was starting to think that maybe that was a lie and he was really out on the date with some woman. I was thinking maybe I should call him and see if he was really there or I was going to have the locks changed and get a divorce. 

I heard doors slam from next door and I thought it was probably the guy next door going to work.

All of a sudden, two tall men appeared at my door. A man in a black hat and coat and a firefighter in full regalia, ready to fight a fire- dressed in a red suit and firefighter hat.

The firefighter left and the man in black continued to stand there in the doorway, smoking a cigarette.

I started yelling,' What do you want? Who are you?"

He said, "My name in Ken Kerri. I need help!"

I said, "You shouldn't be smoking. It's not good for you."

He ignored my statement.

He started to leave and I yelled after him, "What do you need? What do you need?"

But he didn't answer and left the building.

As soon as he walked out, the doorway across the hall from me opened and Robert Redford and Paul Neuman came out, looked at me, and then followed Ken Kerry outside into the dark.

The my son Michael came into the bedroom and said the school bus was coming at 3:30 a.m. to take him to school because it was-mid-winter and there was a big snowstorm and the roads were blocked with drifts.

I woke up. Joe asked me what I was dreaming and I told him. He said he knew who Ken Kerri was. He told me that Ken Kerri was a famous 'water treatment' teacher and had written books on how to treat water, so its safe to drink. He had never mentioned the name to me before.

Robert Redford and Paul Neuman are environmental activists. 


We looked at the clock and it was exactly 3:30 a.m.

After I got up and turned on the TV, the movie "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" was on with Robert Redford and Paul Neuman as stars.


4-29-04 - THE HOLE IN THE WALL GANG - DREAM - I was in an apartment building where I used to work in Milwaukee, WI. The owner of the building was very suspicious that the current manager was up to no good. He thought she was trying to steal money. 

As we walked past the office, we could hear some odd tapping sounds on the wall on the inside of the wall where the closet would be.

The owner told me and my boyfriend to keep our eye on her, because if she stole any money, he was going to have her jailed.

As luck would have it, my boyfriend and I were standing right there as the tapping noise got louder and louder and then a hand broke through the walls and then the Manager's head too.

(The Manager looked like an old white-haired lady - a cross between Doris Roberts and Ethel Mertz)

I told my boyfriend to grab her hand so I could call 911. He did that and she started to struggle and try to pull free so I told him to knock her head against the file cabinet, which he did and she was out cold. I saw her actually turn grey as she went unconscious.

So I dialed 911 and the man who answered the phone turned out to be the Manager's attorney. He was at the police station already, pleading her case about what she was doing and she wasn't even going to be charged with anything. She had already told them in advance that she as making a slot in the wall so people could drop off their rent checks to pay rent if she wasn't in the office. 

It was an awfully big hole in the wall, big enough to crawl through to be called a slot, but nevertheless the cops were agreeing that what she did was okay.

Meanwhile, she was laying unconscious on the other side of the wall.

I felt so guilty for what we had done, I told my boyfriend, "I'm getting out of here!"

I went up to the 4th floor whereupon I met another ex-manager. She said, "I heard something going on in the office. What happened.?"

So I told her the story about the owner being suspicious about the manager maybe trying to steal money and the hole in the wall episode.

The woman said, "She must have been awfully lonely sitting in that office day after day with nobody to talk to."

I knew that wasn't quite true, because I was never lonely when I had the job. I found it quite exciting with all the people coming in to pay rent and telling me their problems and showing empty apartments to new people and making new friends. Nevertheless I also thought it was a great idea to have a 'slot' in the wall for people to slip checks through for rent payments.

(We actually had a slot in the door for that purpose.)

So, after discussing the situation with the ex-manager, she left and I was feeling really guilty for what my boyfriend and I had done.

Then I met a woman in the hall who was carrying a long, thick pole like one would find in a closet, but much, much longer.

I don't know what she intended to do with it, but I took it from her and continued to walk on down the hall, trying to figure out what I was going to do with it.

I felt too guilty to think very well. 


4-30-04 - DREAM - I was at work and for some reason I didn't have the use of my own car, so when I had to make a try around the city. I had to use public transportation and a credit card.

On this trip, I took 3 of my own kids, plus I took a chubby young man who also lost the use of his own car and had nobody to help him out. I told him not to worry about anything that I would get him home eventually if he just stuck with us, because I had the credit card and the expense was not the object. All day, during the journey, he would thank me for the ride on the bus and the food I provided at each meal.

Finally, at the end of the day, we got back to work and I asked one of the men who was going , directions to take the young man all the way back to his home, which he did.

At work then, we were seated at desks which were placed in a square. I believe there were 16 desks 4 x 4 :

.  .  .  .
.  .  .  .
.  .  .  .
.  .  .  .

While I was sitting at my desk, I started receiving gifts and a little seed with the name of one of the brothers of the young man we had helped during the day. This was a thank you from each of them.

While we were doing this, a young blond woman was playing a trick on another one of the young workers. The young man had a cat in the office which kept down the mice at night, but while we were there, he fed the cat milk and fruit loops in a little bowl by his desk. (Fruit loops are like large multi-colored, sweetened Cheerios)

The woman took a plastic lid over the bowl so you could still see the milk and fruit loops, but the cat couldn't get to it, so he would ask the man for more milk. The young man would give the cat more milk, but without the plastic lid on the bowl, the milk spilled on the floor.

I caught the young woman trying a second time to trick the young man and his cat and I was so angry at her, I kicked her in the shin with my bare foot. I felt the toe nail of my big toe connect with her skin so I knew I hurt her and that she had to have felt the paint. 

Everyone then knew the trick she had pulled. I told her publicly, "Jokes are fine after work, but not in the office," an she walked away angry. 

I continued to receive the thank you cards for helping the young man, until I had 10 of them. That was the number of brothers there were.

Right before it was time to go home, the young woman came back, disguised as an Arab Sheik or something with a green hood over his head and a huge voluminous cape like they wear in the desert.

The Arab man said that he would give me a ride home from work for all I had done.

But I knew it was the young woman, trying to get back at me for catching her at her trick at the cat and the young man and I had a feeling that if I went with the Arab man, there was no telling what the consequences would be to me. So I refused the ride.

As I woke up, I was told that this was the Windsor Classic.






dream is missing


ahuras - "Definitions; Lords (Old Iranian). Associated spellings/words: Asuras."

Ahura Mazda - "Definitions: lord wisdom; good spirit; creator of all good things. History: a name used in ancient Persia for the state of Godhood; Zoroaster's name for God [incidentally, the Persians always wrote the name of the god as one word, but Zoroaster would use the words separately and in no fixed order]. Mythology: Persian sun god born as the twin brother of the dark god Ahriman from the womb of Infinite Time, the Primal Creatress. The fight between the brothers, resulting in Ahriman's fall from heaven, had the same cause as the rivalry between Cain and Abel - that is, the sacrificial offering of one was accepted by the older deity, and that of the other was rejected. The older deity was Vayu, probably a derivative of the Vedic celestial androgyny Varuna, or Mitra- Varuna, whose other name became Mithra. Associated spellings/words: Ahura ['Lord'] + Mazda ['good; to remember']; Ormazd; Ormazd; Hormizd; Urmaysda ['the sun']; Remazd ['the sun']."

hura - "Definitions: wind." (Taino)

Ahura - "Definitions: God, lord (Persian).

Associated spellings/words: Ahura Mazda ['first father of the Righteous Order, who gave to the sun and stars their path']."

Hora - "Definitions: Greek goddess of the seasons and the order of nature. Associated spellings/ words: hora ['hour'] (French); ahora ['now'] (Spanish); ERA ['period of time associated with something']; Horus (Egyptian)."

Hura, a one-time man.

Hura the entity, HAPPINESS. In all the Avanischor system, which descended to the Haptans and afterward to the Hijans, and finally to the Vedes of the Upper Tibet, happiness is called an entity; so is unhappiness; so is faith; so is unbelief; and they are likened to seeds planted, which grow by nurture, according to the behavior of mortals, into great trees. If, therefore, a man strive for Hura (happiness), it will grow in him, and not until he so striveth. And likewise of the other entities.